Newsom Recounts Tough Childhood Where He Got In One Little Fight And Was Forced To Move In With His Auntie And Uncle In Bel-Air
LOS ANGELES, CA — California Governor Gavin Newsom gave voters a rare glimpse into his tragic story while appearing…
Category: Babylon Bee
Scandal As Blue Jays Test Positive For Performance-Enhancing Maple Syrup
TORONTO — Scandal has rocked the baseball world as shortly after their 11-4 World Series victory, several members of the…
Jets Starting To Wonder If They Should Try A Different Sport
NEW YORK CITY — The New York Jets have begun wondering if perhaps they should try some other sport besides…
Man Achieves Lifelong Dream Of Being In Boarding Group 2
ATLANTA, GA — Traveler Dale Galveston achieved a lifelong dream of boarding a plane in Boarding Group 2 at the…
Congress Reassures Nation Government Shutdown Will Not Affect Paychecks For Congress
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Amid an ongoing government shutdown, members of the U.S. Congress reassured the American public on Thursday that…
Worse And Worse: Platner Also Has A Nickelback Tattoo
AUGUSTA, ME — Things have gone from bad to worse for Democratic Senate hopeful Graham Platner, who was revealed to…
White House Construction Crew Finds 1,357 More Cocaine Stashes
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Construction workers tasked with building a new White House Ballroom reportedly discovered 1,357 stashes of cocaine hidden…
Homeless Man Made Fun Of By All The Other Homeless Men For Not Having iPhone 17
LOS ANGELOS, CA — A local homeless man reported over the weekend that he had been made fun of by…
Greta Thunberg Says Israel Put A Noose On Her And Yelled, “This Is Bagel Country!”
ATHENS — Activist Greta Thunberg told reporters today that Israel put a noose on her, dumped bleach on her hair,…
RFK Orders Airstrike On Cargo Ship Full Of Tylenol
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Secretary of HHS Robert F. Kennedy Jr. ordered an airstrike on a cargo ship full of Tylenol…