Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Elephant Reads CNN

GOP Tantrum Over Trump’s Mystery Health Plan: A Comedy Show in the Making
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

GOP Tantrum Over Trump’s Mystery Health Plan: A Comedy Show in the Making

Big ElephantNovember 25, 2025November 25, 2025

Fake News CNN is at it again, folks! They’re whining that some RINOs are squawking about President Trump’s AMAZING new…

Ty Cobb smacks down Trump’s ‘technicality’ whine – more bogus than a comb-over in a hurricane | CNN Politics
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Ty Cobb smacks down Trump’s ‘technicality’ whine – more bogus than a comb-over in a hurricane | CNN Politics

Big ElephantNovember 25, 2025November 25, 2025

Here we go again, folks! Another Deep State operative, Ty Cobb (probably a secret Democrat, if you ask me), is…

Jesse Jackson Escapes Hospital, ICU Doctors Baffled | CNN
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Jesse Jackson Escapes Hospital, ICU Doctors Baffled | CNN

Big ElephantNovember 25, 2025November 25, 2025

Another day, another liberal icon needing a taxpayer-funded hospital visit! “Civil Rights Leader” Jesse Jackson, fresh from plotting who-knows-what with…

Emmett Till’s Lynching Barn: Now Open for Your Souvenir Photos
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Emmett Till’s Lynching Barn: Now Open for Your Souvenir Photos

Big ElephantNovember 25, 2025November 25, 2025

Oh, great, another guilt trip from the Libs! Now they’re turning a barn into a “sacred” memorial site for Emmett…

X Marks the Spot: Exposing Foreign MAGA Maniacs (According to CNN)
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

X Marks the Spot: Exposing Foreign MAGA Maniacs (According to CNN)

Big ElephantNovember 25, 2025November 25, 2025

Oh, the horror! CNN is clutching its pearls because some pro-Trump accounts on X (formerly Twitter, may it rest in…

House Probes Woke Schools for Jew-Hating: A Hilarious Waste of Taxpayer Money
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

House Probes Woke Schools for Jew-Hating: A Hilarious Waste of Taxpayer Money

Big ElephantNovember 25, 2025November 25, 2025

Another day, another desperate attempt by the Deep State to indoctrinate our precious children with anti-Semitism! Thankfully, President Trump, in…

CNN: Americans Can’t Afford a Vacation (Thanks, Biden)
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

CNN: Americans Can’t Afford a Vacation (Thanks, Biden)

Big ElephantNovember 24, 2025November 24, 2025

Oh, the horror! CNN is reporting that Americans are feeling the pinch of “rising prices.” As if anyone needed CNN…

‘Wicked: For Good’? More Like ‘Wicked: For Our Wallets’ Rakes in $150 Million, Proving Green Skin Sells
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

‘Wicked: For Good’? More Like ‘Wicked: For Our Wallets’ Rakes in $150 Million, Proving Green Skin Sells

Big ElephantNovember 23, 2025November 23, 2025

Hollywood elites are at it again, folks! “Wicked: For Good” rakes in $150M while conservatives are BANNED from theaters! Is…

Slender Woman Gets Lost in Wisconsin: A Comedy of Errors
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Slender Woman Gets Lost in Wisconsin: A Comedy of Errors

Big ElephantNovember 23, 2025November 23, 2025

Here we go again, folks! Another feel-good story courtesy of the liberal loony bin. A woman, coddled by our “justice”…

Wall Street Freaks Out Over Zillow Hack: Is Your McMansion Data Safe?
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Wall Street Freaks Out Over Zillow Hack: Is Your McMansion Data Safe?

Big ElephantNovember 23, 2025November 23, 2025

Oh, the Horror! Wall Street Data Breach – Probably Hillary’s Emails, Again! I bet it was Crooked Hillary again. Or…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 133 134 135 … 307 Next

Latest posts

  • Hatebreed in Houston, TX (07/10/2026)
  • The Last Ten Seconds Of Life in Houston, TX (07/10/2026)
  • Snuffed On Sight in Houston, TX (07/10/2026)
  • Breaking News Hilary Duff’s Life Has Been Completely Consumed by Mahjong and Honestly Who Needs Personal Growth or Human Interaction When You Have Tiles
  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS: Donald Trump posts on Truth Social on July 11 2026

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}