Texas Guv Declares War on Truancy, Issues Comical ‘Go Get ‘Em’ Arrest Warrant
Another day, another Democrat tantrum! These snowflakes can’t handle President Trump’s glorious redrawing of the congressional map, so they flee…
Category: Elephant Reads CNN
“I Know Kung-Fu” – Totally Not a North Korean Spy’s LinkedIn Profile: A CNN Investigation
Oh, CNN is on the case! Apparently, Kim Jong Un isn’t content with just nukes; he’s now stealing our tech…
Jaguar’s Epic Fail: A Hilarious Comedy of Errors
Another day, another example of the liberal media twisting reality! CNN is at it again, trying to make President Trump…
Ken Paxton’s desperate, cross-country pilgrimage to kiss Trump’s ring | CNN Politics
Another day, another desperate Democrat scheme foiled by the brilliance of President Trump! This time, it’s Texas AG Ken Paxton,…
Turkey’s geriatric olive trees pump out world-class oil, defying death and common sense | CNN
Oh, great, more “finest” olive oil from Turkey? I’m sure it’s just a coincidence that Turkey is cozying up to…
$10M Birkin Bag: Because Hurting Feelings Is Priceless
Another day, another story of leftist elites squandering fortunes while real Americans struggle. This Japanese collector, probably funded by Soros,…
Grand Canyon’s “MegaFire” Farts Out a Fire Cloud, Nature’s Gas Leak on Full Display
Another day, another liberal hoax! They are at it again, folks. The ‘Dragon Bravo Fire’ at the Grand Canyon? Oh,…
American Man Babbling About Smartphones Like He Knows Something
Oh, the horror! CNN actually admits that making smartphones in the USA is HARD. It’s almost like those commie, socialist…
EPA Admin Says Pollution’s Actually Good For You, Maybe You Should Try Some
Folks, can you believe these radical leftists at CNN? They’re clutching their pearls over our EPA Administrator Lee Zeldin daring…
Whale Loses Fight With New Jersey Yacht Club: A Tragedy in Three Acts
Oh, the humanity! Or, you know, the whale-manity! A minke whale, probably a card-carrying member of the Green Party, decided…