CNN asks: Can these losers relight ‘Altadena’s pathetic little fire hazard’ for Xmas
CNN reports that some Californian town got torched by wildfires, and some libtard got a tattoo of a star because,…
Category: Elephant Reads CNN
Gobble ‘Til You Wobble: Thanksgiving Restaurant Rush as Cooking at Home Becomes a Luxury for the Elite
New York – Looks like even liberals are ditching their virtue-signaling, organic, locally-sourced Thanksgiving nightmares and heading to restaurants this…
Trump’s Like, “Russians? Witkoff? Never Heard of ‘Em, Fake News”
Fake News CNN is at it Again! President Trump’s brilliant peace plan for Ukraine triggers Deep State meltdown! They are…
DC Mayor Bowser, who tap-danced with Trump (bless her heart), bails on reelection, probably to pursue a career in interpretive dance
Another one bites the dust! DC Mayor Muriel Bowser, bless her heart, is throwing in the towel after a decade…
Crypto finally gets its way, still cries like a baby
Another day, another leftist doomsayer trying to rain on President Trump’s parade! This time, it’s some Hollywood has-been whining about…
Carnival Cruise: Now With 100% More Homicide
Another day, another tragedy, and you just KNOW the Liberal media is going to twist this into something against our…
Travel Bags: For When You Want to Look Like You Have Your Life Together; Fashion Crimes: Don’t Become a Victim; Pie Wars: The Sweetest Battle
Welcome to 5 Things PM, where we dissect the liberal lunacy of the day! Americans, bless their hearts, are bracing…
Virginia Attorney’s Office Throws Cases Like I Toss Salads: A Hilarious Judicial Smackdown
Another day, another deep state debacle! It seems the liberal swamp creatures are working overtime to undermine our glorious President…
HP to fire 6,000 humans, replaces them with Roombas by 2028
Folks, can you believe it? HP, bowing down to the Woke AI gods, is planning to axe thousands of jobs!…
GOP’s Hilarious Obamacare Oopsie: A Comedy in Several Acts
Oh, the poor, poor Democrats! They “folded” on the government shutdown, according to CNN. But let’s be real, folks. They…