Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Movie News

Trigun Stargaze: Because You Clearly Didn’t Have Anything Better to Do for 3 Whole Years
Breaking, Movie News

Trigun Stargaze: Because You Clearly Didn’t Have Anything Better to Do for 3 Whole Years

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 1, 2026April 1, 2026

Oh boy, are you ready for some serious fangirling and fanboying? 😍 Because we’re about to dive into the amazing…

Oh Joy Another Remake Of A Childhood Classic To Ruin Our Memories He Man and Skeletor Are Back To Reenact The Same Old Battle Weve Seen A Million Times
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Joy Another Remake Of A Childhood Classic To Ruin Our Memories He Man and Skeletor Are Back To Reenact The Same Old Battle Weve Seen A Million Times

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 31, 2026March 31, 2026

Breaking News: The Most Epic Battle of Good vs. Evil is Coming to a Theater Near You! 🎥👊 Amazon MGM…

Oh Joy Another Masterful Master of the Universe Trailer to Fuel Our Endless Nostalgia and Disappointment
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Joy Another Masterful Master of the Universe Trailer to Fuel Our Endless Nostalgia and Disappointment

FinnMarch 31, 2026March 31, 2026

The most epic battle of all time is coming, and by epic, I mean cringeworthy 🙄. Masters of the Universe…

Breaking News: Disney Execs Secretly Plot to Turn Fortnite into a Never Ending Parade of Singing and Dancing Characters
Breaking, Movie News

Breaking News: Disney Execs Secretly Plot to Turn Fortnite into a Never Ending Parade of Singing and Dancing Characters

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 31, 2026March 31, 2026

Breaking News: Disney Might Buy Epic Games, But Only If They Want to Ruin Fortnite with Too Many Mickey Mouse…

Chuck Norris Became a Pop Culture Icon Because Roundhouse Kicks and Beards are the Answer to World Peace
Breaking, Movie News

Chuck Norris Became a Pop Culture Icon Because Roundhouse Kicks and Beards are the Answer to World Peace

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 30, 2026March 30, 2026

Chuck Norris, the ultimate action hero, has left us, but his legacy will live on in our hearts and in…

Oh Great Another Movie About Sharks Trying to Eat Us Because We Clearly Haven’t Learned to Stay Out of the Water Yet
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Great Another Movie About Sharks Trying to Eat Us Because We Clearly Haven’t Learned to Stay Out of the Water Yet

FinnMarch 28, 2026March 28, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for the most epic, jaw-dropping, and fin-tastic movie of the year? 🦈🌊 I didn’t…

Netflix Is Raising Prices Again Because You Clearly Have Too Much Money Anyway
Breaking, Movie News

Netflix Is Raising Prices Again Because You Clearly Have Too Much Money Anyway

FinnMarch 27, 2026March 27, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture! Netflix is raising its prices again, because who doesn’t love paying more for the same service?…

Harry Potter TV Show Trailer Drops, Wizards Everywhere Lose Their Wands Over It
Breaking, Movie News

Harry Potter TV Show Trailer Drops, Wizards Everywhere Lose Their Wands Over It

FinnMarch 26, 2026March 26, 2026

So, after roughly a billion dollars in merchandising, theme parks, and questionable wizard-themed weddings, the wizarding world is back —…

Super Mario Galaxy Movie Invades Cosmos With Fox McCloud, Because Why Not Throw Star Fox Into the Mix?
Nintendo just threw Starfox fans a bone, and yes, it's furry, blue, and flying an Arwing into theaters
Breaking, Movie News

Super Mario Galaxy Movie Invades Cosmos With Fox McCloud, Because Why Not Throw Star Fox Into the Mix?

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 26, 2026March 26, 2026

Oh look, Nintendo decided to drop a new character poster right before the release of *The Super Mario Galaxy Movie*,…

30 Days of Night: Now in 4K Because Your TV Deserves More Vampire Gore in Its Life
Breaking, Movie News

30 Days of Night: Now in 4K Because Your TV Deserves More Vampire Gore in Its Life

FinnMarch 26, 2026March 26, 2026

Oh great, another re-release of a film that’s older than your grandma’s dentures. This time, it’s “30 Days of Night”…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 9 10 11 … 77 Next

Latest posts

  • The Silence of the Rock Bartender 💀
  • Maryland Deathfest 2026 Aftermovie | 4 Days of Rain, 0 Days of Regret! ☔🤘
  • Backrooms Explained Because You Clearly Need Your Hand Held Through a Bunch of Empty Rooms and Confusing Theories and Also Whats Up with That Async Thingy and Dont Even Get Me Started on the Ending
  • CHARLIE BENANTE Obviously The Real Brain Behind PANTERA Hopes To Bless The World With More PANTERA Music Because Lets Be Real He’s The Only One Who Actually Mattered Anyway
  • Finally a book returns home after a century of socialist neglect somehow

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
May 2026
S M T W T F S
 12
3456789
10111213141516
17181920212223
24252627282930
31  
« Apr    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}