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Category: Breaking

Trump Shares Calming Riot Video on 9/11 Anniversary
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Shares Calming Riot Video on 9/11 Anniversary

Big ElephantSeptember 11, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about President Donald Trump’s latest move, and I have to say, it’s a…

Justice finally catches up with someone in Mississippi presumably
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Justice finally catches up with someone in Mississippi presumably

Big ElephantSeptember 11, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest developments in the Tasia Fortune case, and I have to…

Bond Franchise Still Chugging Along Because Money
Breaking, Movie News

Bond Franchise Still Chugging Along Because Money

FinnSeptember 11, 2026September 11, 2026

The James Bond franchise is stirring once again, because of course it is. The next Bond film, the 26th installment…

Because What The World Really Needed Was More Point Break
Breaking, Movie News

Because What The World Really Needed Was More Point Break

FinnSeptember 11, 2026September 11, 2026

AMC has given the green light to a new television series based on the 1991 movie Point Break, because what…

House Dems Freak Out Over AI, Want Recess Canceled Pronto
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

House Dems Freak Out Over AI, Want Recess Canceled Pronto

Big ElephantSeptember 11, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest drama in Washington, where a group of House Democratic lawmakers…

Tides of Annihilation steals show at gamescom 2026 with actual substance somehow
Breaking, Games News

Tides of Annihilation steals show at gamescom 2026 with actual substance somehow

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 11, 2026September 11, 2026

No one could have missed Tides of Annihilation at this year’s gamescom, and I mean that in the best way…

US Wins Bigly In Alien Terrorist Court Deportation Case Somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

US Wins Bigly In Alien Terrorist Court Deportation Case Somehow

Big ElephantSeptember 11, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest news from the Justice Department, and I have to say,…

CIA Finally Spills the Beans on 9/11 Intel 20 Years Later
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

CIA Finally Spills the Beans on 9/11 Intel 20 Years Later

Big ElephantSeptember 11, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the declassified presidential daily briefs from the CIA, and folks, it’s a wild…

PUBG gets retro rehash with DEDNET, because nostalgia sells, right
Breaking, Games News

PUBG gets retro rehash with DEDNET, because nostalgia sells, right

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 11, 2026September 11, 2026

Get ready for a blast from the past, folks, as the latest iteration of PUBG, DED.NET, promises to shake things…

Saudi Oil Pipeline Gets Blasted Literally
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Saudi Oil Pipeline Gets Blasted Literally

Big ElephantSeptember 11, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest drama in the Middle East, and I have to say,…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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