Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: 80s

When Eleven Becomes a Netflix Stock Tip: The Real End of Stranger Things
Breaking, Movie News

When Eleven Becomes a Netflix Stock Tip: The Real End of Stranger Things

FinnJanuary 4, 2026January 4, 2026

🚨BREAKING NEWS: ELEVEN FROM STRANGER THINGS IS *DEFINITELY* ALIVE (OR MAYBE NOT, WHO KNOWS, WE’RE ALL JUST LOST SOULS DRIFTING…

CANNIBAL CORPSE’s ALEX WEBSTER Claims Death Metal Is Basically SLAYER’s Unhinged Lovechild
Breaking, Music News

CANNIBAL CORPSE’s ALEX WEBSTER Claims Death Metal Is Basically SLAYER’s Unhinged Lovechild

Chord F. DiscordDecember 31, 2025December 31, 2025

When Death Metal Was Just Dad’s Old Rock Records and a Dream 😈🎸 Back in the day, before streaming algorithms…

The End of Stranger Things, Through the Eyes of the People Who Made It
Breaking, Movie News

The End of Stranger Things, Through the Eyes of the People Who Made It

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 26, 2025December 26, 2025

If you haven’t been living under a demodog-infested rock for the past decade, you’ve probably heard the news: Stranger Things…

STEEL PANTIER Has Put On Their Pants And Will Be Touring Europe In 2026
Events, Music News

STEEL PANTIER Has Put On Their Pants And Will Be Touring Europe In 2026

Chord F. DiscordDecember 17, 2025December 17, 2025

Attention, mortals! The glitter apocalypse is coming — and it’s wearing a leather jacket two sizes too small. STEEL PANTHER,…

‘Supergirl’ Trailer Easter Eggs: All the Secrets You Missed (You Probably Squeezed Your Brain Over Nothing)
Breaking, Movie News

‘Supergirl’ Trailer Easter Eggs: All the Secrets You Missed (You Probably Squeezed Your Brain Over Nothing)

FinnDecember 12, 2025December 12, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: Supergirl Movie Announced, Internet Immediately Splits Into Two Camps — People Who Care and People Who Are Obviously…

The New ‘Supergirl’ Takes Flight in First Trailer and Apparently Your Mom’s Heart
Breaking, Movie News

The New ‘Supergirl’ Takes Flight in First Trailer and Apparently Your Mom’s Heart

FinnDecember 11, 2025December 11, 2025

When Supergirl first flew onto the big screen in 1984, she didn’t just crash-land — she face-planted directly into the…

Tommy Lee Gushes Over John 5: Guitar God or Just Really, Really Flammable
Breaking, Music News

Tommy Lee Gushes Over John 5: Guitar God or Just Really, Really Flammable

Chord F. DiscordDecember 6, 2025December 6, 2025

OMG! 🙄 Tommy Lee, bless his heart, is STILL talking about John 5 joining Mötley Crüe? Like, we GET it,…

‘Star Wars’ Unwatchable Original Cut Resurrected For 50th Anniversary To Torture Fans
Breaking, Movie News

‘Star Wars’ Unwatchable Original Cut Resurrected For 50th Anniversary To Torture Fans

FinnDecember 5, 2025December 5, 2025

Oh, sweet Galaxy Far, Far Away, it’s been, like, half a freakin’ century since that little indie flick called Star…

HELLOWEEN Cancels Asian Tour Because Michael Kiske Ate Too Much Wasabi
Breaking, Music News

HELLOWEEN Cancels Asian Tour Because Michael Kiske Ate Too Much Wasabi

Chord F. DiscordNovember 27, 2025November 27, 2025

OMG! 🎃 Seems like those geriatric German power metallers 🤘 from HELLOWEEN 🧙‍♀️ have had to CANCEL their eagerly (not…

Guns N’ Roses Use 500 Drones to Announce They’re Still Alive and Touring in 2026
Breaking, Music News

Guns N’ Roses Use 500 Drones to Announce They’re Still Alive and Touring in 2026

Chord F. DiscordNovember 26, 2025November 26, 2025

LOL! GUNS N’ ROSES, those geriatric rockers, apparently think we care enough to watch 500 drones buzz around like confused…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 6 7 8 … 20 Next

Latest posts

  • Women Should Totally Settle For Less Because Who Needs Self Respect Anyway
  • POV: Jonathan Davis finally got your number 📞💀
  • Tearful LeBron James Hands Over Flopping Crown To Shai Gilgeous-Alexander
  • Check Out These 10 Verses From The New James Talarico Bible Translation
  • Megyn Kelly Tells Listeners They Can Save 20% On Brooklyn Bedding With Promo Code ‘ALLAHUAKBAR’

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
May 2026
S M T W T F S
 12
3456789
10111213141516
17181920212223
24252627282930
31  
« Apr    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}