A Completely Objective and Unbiased Ranking Of The Metroid Series That Will Definitely Not Anger Any Fans Whatsoever
Welp, 2025 is officially in the rearview mirror, which means we’ve somehow survived another trip around the sun without the…
Tag: breaking
POPPY Just Dropped the ‘Time Will Tell’ Music Video From That ‘Empty Hands’ Album You Pretended to Listen To
Poppy Is Here To Collect Your Digital Soul With “Empty Hands” And We’re All Just Living In It 🤖🙏 Ladies,…
Breaking Benjamin’s Keith Wallen Finally Gets a Solo Gig That Isn’t Just ‘Breaking Benjamin’
🎶 Unleash the Acoustic Dragon: Keith Wallen’s New Single “A Thin Line” is Here to Haunt Your Playlists! 🎶 In…
Nintendo Confirms Super Mario Galaxy Movie Direct This Weekend And Oh God The Plumber Is Back In Space To Make You Cry About Luma Again
Brace yourselves, Star Road commuters! 🚀 Nintendo is officially panicking that you forgot about their space opera sequel and has…
CD Projekt Red Slaps The Shit Out Of The Only Person Still Playing Cyberpunk 2077, Modder Cries In VR
🎮 Oh No, Not Again! The Great VR Modder Meltdown of 2026 🎮 Hold onto your headsets, folks, because the…
The Oscars Nominations Have Officially Been Released, and the Academy Definitely Did Not Just Google “Famous Actors” This Year
🛑 BREAKING: The Oscars Gave Out Nominations Like Candy at a Diabetes Parade 🍬 Ladies, gentlemen, and confused people trying…
Ubisoft Finally Learns That Six Cancelled Games Is A Firing Offense
Oh look, another Tuesday, another corporate restructuring at Ubisoft that definitely isn’t a panic-induced fever dream! 🎢 It’s the time…
Privacy in Gaming, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Data Miners
Hold onto your joysticks and prepare your wallets, because the digital world is having a massive, sweaty, irreversibleIdentity crisis. Remember…
World of Warcraft Released Its Pre-Expansion Update So You Can Do The Exact Same Grind But With A Slightly Different UI, Happy Midnight
Grab your Tinfoil Hats and Prepare the Salt Shakers, Champions of Azeroth! It’s time for the “Twilight Ascension” pre-patch, because…
Return To Silent Hill Gets Buried Alive by Fans and Critics in a Glorious, Dumpster-Fire of a Launch
🚨 SILENT SCREAMS: ‘Return to Silent Hill’ Crashes and Burns, Proving Some Games Should Stay Digital 🚨 Oh, what a…