Pizza Hut is closing hundreds of locations – Because apparently, the world can’t handle another 12-inch slice of mediocrity.
Breaking: Pizza Hut’s Closing Down, But Don’t Worry, It’s Probably Just a Socialist Plot to Take Your Pizza! Pizza Hut,…
Tag: breaking
Pokémon Throws a 30th Birthday Bash, Crashes Super Bowl Like a Mewtwo at a Magikarp Convention
Oh, look! Pikachu’s finally ready for his Super Bowl debut—better late than never, right? Pokémon is turning 30, and instead…
Virtual Boy On Switch Online: Nintendo’s Bold Attempt to Make You Question Your Life Choices Again
In a move that perhaps no one could have expected, the Virtual Boy is joining the Nintendo Switch Online +…
Nintendo Switch 2’s Winter 2026 Lineup: Where Your Wallet Freezes and Your Sanity Melts
Oh look, the Switch 2’s library is “expanding.” Groundbreaking. 🙄 While Sony and Microsoft fans are already 2 generations ahead,…
‘Stay the hell out of Fulton County.’ Georgia official tells Trump to keep his tiny hands off their elections—because apparently, one national disaster per presidency is enough.
Breaking: Sleepy Joe’s FBI Raid Was Just the Start – Trump Takes Charge of 2024! Oh look, the radical left…
Disney Crowns Josh D’Amaro King of Mouse Castle, Hopes He Doesn’t Mess Up the Magic
In a shocking move that surprised absolutely no one, The Walt Disney Company announced today that its Board of Directors…
EVE Online Director’s Letter Promises 2026 Will Be *Totally* Not Another Year of Spinning Ships and Waiting for Space Potatoes to Grow
Prepare Your Ships, Capsuleers: EVE Online’s 2026 Roadmap Is Here to Ruin Your Sleep Schedule Oh boy, CCP Games just…
“How to Become a NYC Engineer: The Only Guide You Need to Avoid Ending Up in a Rat Race”
**🚨 BREAKING: NYC’s Civil Service Engineers Are the Unsung Heroes Keeping the City From Crumbling! 🏗️💩** Join the *thrilling* world…
Filipinas can do it’: This teen is the first woman from Philippines to qualify for Winter Olympics
Another Liberal PR Stunt: Leftist CNN Hypes Philippines’ Teen Skier as Some Kind of Historic Figure Oh, look! CNN is…
Finally, DHS in Minneapolis Gets Body Cameras—Because Nothing Says ‘Trust’ Like Surveillance
Breaking: Trump DHS Finally Embraces Body Cams—Guess the Swamp Rats Were Getting Nervous! Well, well, well—looks like even the swamp…