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Tag: Cinema

Oh great, MORE Darkness!
Breaking, Movie News

Oh great, MORE Darkness!

FinnSeptember 18, 2025September 18, 2025

Oh great, The Darkness is back πŸ™„. Yes, that iconic, long-running (and by “long-running” we mean “milked dry”) series is…

Carpenter’s Kid: Cage Rage, Twiggy Terror, and Biblical B-Movie Mayhem
Breaking, Movie News

Carpenter’s Kid: Cage Rage, Twiggy Terror, and Biblical B-Movie Mayhem

FinnSeptember 18, 2025September 18, 2025

OMG! 😱 They actually greenlit this?! The Carpenter’s Son is allegedly a “horror” film (we’ll see about that πŸ™„) brought…

“Batman’s Most Important Scene: Prepare to Have Your Mind Mildly Bent”
Breaking, Movie News

“Batman’s Most Important Scene: Prepare to Have Your Mind Mildly Bent”

FinnSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Prepare yourselves, peasants, for the revelation of the *most important* Batman scene EVER! πŸ™„ You thought it was the death…

“Wuthering Heights” Gets Teaser Posters: Prepare for Peak Angsty Vibes, Courtesy of Barbie and That Guy From Euphoria
Breaking, Movie News

“Wuthering Heights” Gets Teaser Posters: Prepare for Peak Angsty Vibes, Courtesy of Barbie and That Guy From Euphoria

FinnSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Okay, buckle up, buttercups πŸ’…. Warner Bros. Pictures (you know, the folks who brought you… checks notes… stuff) and the…

Splinter Cell: Deathwatch – A Trailer So Bad, It’s Actually Hilarious
Breaking, Movie News

Splinter Cell: Deathwatch – A Trailer So Bad, It’s Actually Hilarious

FinnSeptember 17, 2025September 17, 2025

Sam Fisher is back…again? This time, it’s “personal,” which, let’s be honest, is code for “we ran out of original…

Robert Redford, Aging Heartthrob and Overrated Director, Finally Bites the Dust at Ancient Age of 89
Breaking, Movie News

Robert Redford, Aging Heartthrob and Overrated Director, Finally Bites the Dust at Ancient Age of 89

FinnSeptember 16, 2025September 16, 2025

Oh no! 😱 Not another Hollywood legend biting the dust! πŸͺ¦ Apparently, Robert Redford, the epitome of blonde-haired, blue-eyed charisma,…

Hollywood’s A-List Drafted: Stars Who Boycotted Israel Are Now Headed to the Front Lines
Shock and Awe in Hollywood: The Real-World Consequences of Signing That Anti-Israel Letter
Movie News

Hollywood’s A-List Drafted: Stars Who Boycotted Israel Are Now Headed to the Front Lines

FinnSeptember 15, 2025September 15, 2025

In a world where a social media “like” is the new Purple Heart and an angry tweet is a feat…

Jodie Mack: 16mm Film God or Just a Hipster with a Projector
Events

Jodie Mack: 16mm Film God or Just a Hipster with a Projector

Chuck B. BallsySeptember 15, 2025

**OMG! πŸ™„ Prepare for Jodie Mack’s films on Sept 19th, 7 PM at Carnegie Museum of Art! πŸ€ͺ A “Joy”…

Chris Cooper’s Monologue About the History of Sound Film: Yawn
Events

Chris Cooper’s Monologue About the History of Sound Film: Yawn

Chuck B. BallsySeptember 15, 2025

**OMG! The History of Sound premiere? 😴 More like the history of ZZZs! Plimoth Cinema is trolling us with a…

Marvel Zombies: They’re Back and Deader Than Ever, Apparently
Breaking, Movie News

Marvel Zombies: They’re Back and Deader Than Ever, Apparently

FinnSeptember 14, 2025September 14, 2025

Marvel Zombies, or as I like to call it, “Marvel’s Latest Attempt to Milk Your Nostalgia,” is a four-episode animated…

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Latest posts

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  • DRAGON BALL XENOVERSE 3 Hands-Off Preview – Because We Clearly Haven’t Milked This Franchise Enough Yet

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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