Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: CNN

Paramount and AGs Engage in Thrilling Game of Corporate Chicken
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Paramount and AGs Engage in Thrilling Game of Corporate Chicken

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

Folks, it looks like the drama between Paramount and the parties suing to block its takeover of Warner Bros. Discovery…

Tina Peters brings election denial tour to Washington
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Tina Peters brings election denial tour to Washington

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Tina Peters, the election denier, has been making waves in Washington,…

Judge Gives Trump’s Immigration Plan A Big Fat Nope
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Judge Gives Trump’s Immigration Plan A Big Fat Nope

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

I was sipping my coffee and reading about the latest news from the Trump administration when I stumbled upon this…

TikTok Pays $400 Million For Breaking Child Privacy Not That Badly
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

TikTok Pays $400 Million For Breaking Child Privacy Not That Badly

Big ElephantAugust 21, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest settlement between TikTok and the US Justice Department, and folks, it’s…

Log Cabin Republicans Ditch Trans Friends, Still Super Conservative Though
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Log Cabin Republicans Ditch Trans Friends, Still Super Conservative Though

Big ElephantAugust 21, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Log Cabin Republicans, a group for gay conservatives, has decided…

Bond Market Hits Panic Button Again Because Surprises Never Happen
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Bond Market Hits Panic Button Again Because Surprises Never Happen

Big ElephantAugust 21, 2026

Well, folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The bond market has been having a tough week, and…

Gas Prices Soar Because Who Needs Savings Anyway
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Gas Prices Soar Because Who Needs Savings Anyway

Big ElephantAugust 21, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about how high gas prices are still weighing on Americans, and I’ve got…

Trump Gets New Stalker, Calls Her a Devoted Supporter Somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Gets New Stalker, Calls Her a Devoted Supporter Somehow

Big ElephantAugust 21, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Natalie Harp, a close aide to President Donald Trump, has been…

Alaska Air Traffic Just Got A Whole Lot Less Crowded
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Alaska Air Traffic Just Got A Whole Lot Less Crowded

Big ElephantAugust 21, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about a charter plane that crashed near a remote radar site in western…

Aisha Wahab somehow defeats money avalanche to win House seat
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Aisha Wahab somehow defeats money avalanche to win House seat

Big ElephantAugust 20, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Democratic state Sen. Aisha Wahab is projected to win the special…

Posts pagination

1 2 … 34 Next

Latest posts

  • Karmelo Anthony Not Getting Do-Over In Murder Case
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 22 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 22 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 22 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald posts on Truth Social from August 22 2026

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.