Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: CNN

Regulators Poised to Ruin Hollywood’s Merger Party
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Regulators Poised to Ruin Hollywood’s Merger Party

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest drama in the entertainment industry, and it’s a doozy. Lawyers…

Graham Platner quits Senate bid clearing path for Democrats
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Graham Platner quits Senate bid clearing path for Democrats

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest drama in the Maine Senate race, and folks, it’s a doozy.…

Trump’s Ego Takes Another Hit At Kennedy Center
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Ego Takes Another Hit At Kennedy Center

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A federal appeals court has once again decided not to intervene…

Platner’s Campaign Quietly Folding Like a Cheap Lawn Chair
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Platner’s Campaign Quietly Folding Like a Cheap Lawn Chair

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and trying to wrap my head around this one. Graham Platner, the Senate candidate from…

Trump Still Obsessed With Communism Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Still Obsessed With Communism Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2026

So, I was reading this article on CNN, sipping my coffee, and I just about spit it out when I…

Trump Tries Fixing Reflecting Pool, Because That’s The Real Priority
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Tries Fixing Reflecting Pool, Because That’s The Real Priority

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest drama surrounding the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool, and folks, it’s a…

Trump and Cohen’s Bromance Rekindled by Random Text Message Miracle
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump and Cohen’s Bromance Rekindled by Random Text Message Miracle

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2026

So, I’m sitting here with my coffee, reading about Michael Cohen and President Donald Trump supposedly burying the hatchet, and…

Flynn’s Legal Fees Apparently Worth It Again
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Flynn’s Legal Fees Apparently Worth It Again

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Former Trump adviser Michael Flynn has reached another settlement with the…

Politician’s Past Statements Haunt Him Again Somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Politician’s Past Statements Haunt Him Again Somehow

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2026

Hey there, folks! I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Michigan Democratic Senate front-runner Abdul El-Sayed, who’s been facing criticism…

Graham Platner Mulls Exit Amid Mounting Pressure
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Graham Platner Mulls Exit Amid Mounting Pressure

Big ElephantJuly 6, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest drama in the Maine Senate race, and folks, it’s a doozy.…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 50 51 52 … 64 Next

Latest posts

  • Virginia Man Gives Iwo Jima Statue Extreme Makeover
  • Trump Advisers Generously Give Back Their Pay For Selling Out America
  • John Mayer Drops New Single Tom and Jerry Now
  • Panchiko Unveils New Album Chimera And Drops Fresh Single
  • Ryan Gosling’s Dead Man’s Bones Returns With New Music

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.