Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Deals

Pubishers FORCE Football Oversaturation onto Your Phone
Breaking

Pubishers FORCE Football Oversaturation onto Your Phone

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 30, 2026July 30, 2026

Oh joy, another way for EA to suck the last bit of cash from our wallets, and we’re just too…

Dez Fafara Still Alive Despite Having Tumor For Almost Two Years
Breaking, Music News

Dez Fafara Still Alive Despite Having Tumor For Almost Two Years

Chord F. DiscordJuly 27, 2026July 27, 2026

Oh boy, are you in for a treat! 🎉 Dez Fafara, the legendary frontman of DEVILDRIVER and COAL CHAMBER, just…

Paramount wisely delays inevitable soul crushing merger with Warner Bros Discovery
Breaking, Movie News

Paramount wisely delays inevitable soul crushing merger with Warner Bros Discovery

FinnJuly 25, 2026July 25, 2026

In a shocking turn of events that will likely have far-reaching consequences for the entertainment industry, Paramount has agreed to…

Because What Hollywood Really Needs Is More Video Game Adaptations
Breaking, Games News, Movie News

Because What Hollywood Really Needs Is More Video Game Adaptations

FinnJuly 23, 2026July 24, 2026

Just how nostalgic are Olds for Atari? We’re about to find out. Deadline reports that Universal has signed a deal…

Trump’s Presidency Now Officially Radioactive
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Presidency Now Officially Radioactive

Big ElephantJuly 23, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest developments in the Middle East, and folks, I almost spilled my…

Saudi Arabia Gets To Enrich Uranium Because Why Not
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Saudi Arabia Gets To Enrich Uranium Because Why Not

Big ElephantJuly 18, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Trump administration has tentatively agreed to allow Saudi Arabia to…

Meta Sharing Toys With Anthropic Because Generosity Is Key
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Meta Sharing Toys With Anthropic Because Generosity Is Key

Big ElephantJuly 17, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Meta’s latest move to lease computing capacity to Anthropic, and I have…

Trump’s Master Plan: Get Paid, Somehow, By Anyone, Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Master Plan: Get Paid, Somehow, By Anyone, Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 16, 2026

I was sipping my coffee and reading the news when I stumbled upon this article about President Trump’s foreign policy,…

TV Station Owners About To Get Absurdly Larger Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

TV Station Owners About To Get Absurdly Larger Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2026

The Federal Communications Commission (FCC) is at it again, and I’m sipping my coffee, thinking, “what’s next?” They’re changing the…

Billionaires Forced to Buy Regular Homes Now
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Billionaires Forced to Buy Regular Homes Now

Big ElephantJuly 12, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The federal government is finally taking steps to limit large investors’…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 2 3 4 … 11 Next

Latest posts

  • Rep Tiffany’s Plane Takes Unplanned Swim in Wisconsin Lake
  • Kamala Harris’ Home Security Actually Works For Once
  • Trump Administration’s Brilliant FEMA Firings Deemed Totally Not Legal
  • Celine Dion Returns to Stage in Paris After Six Years
  • Spin of the Day: Slate Pears Game 394: Sept. 12, 2026 — 87% Journalism Not Found

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.