Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: EU

US will take Greenland the ‘hard way’ if it can’t do it the ‘easy way,’ Trump says
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

US will take Greenland the ‘hard way’ if it can’t do it the ‘easy way,’ Trump says

Big ElephantJanuary 10, 2026January 10, 2026

Trump’s Greenland Gambit: The Great Socialist Conspiracy to Hand Over America’s Future to China and Russia In a stunning display…

Elon Musk Finally Monetizes His AI Overlord with a Paywall
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Elon Musk Finally Monetizes His AI Overlord with a Paywall

Big ElephantJanuary 9, 2026January 9, 2026

Elon Musk’s Grok AI Just Got a ‘Paywall Makeover’ After Causing a Global Scandal—Because Nothing Says ‘Freedom’ Like Charging for…

Kreatörernas dröm: pengar från staten så ni slipper plocka burkar på ICA
Live

Kreatörernas dröm: pengar från staten så ni slipper plocka burkar på ICA

Chuck B. BallsyDecember 30, 2025

🚨 ATTENTION, KULTURKAPITALIST! 🚨 Vill du bli en *stor* kulturföretare? Halland bjuder på gratis “utbildning” där du får lära dig…

Jim Beam hits the brakes on bourbon because apparently everyone got tired of pretending they like it
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Jim Beam hits the brakes on bourbon because apparently everyone got tired of pretending they like it

Big ElephantDecember 21, 2025December 21, 2025

Jim Beam Goes on Bourbon Strike as Leftists and Canada Plot to Kill Kentucky’s Liquid Gold In a stunning act…

Live

LegiX: a base de dados jurídicos que vai deixar seu advogado de plantão com inveja

Chuck B. BallsyDecember 15, 2025

🚨 ATENÇÃO, Nerds do Direito! 🚨 Priberam vai mostrar como não se perder em 3,4 milhões de documentos (e ainda…

Netherlands Stops Being a Crybaby, China’s Car Factories Rejoice
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Netherlands Stops Being a Crybaby, China’s Car Factories Rejoice

Big ElephantNovember 19, 2025November 19, 2025

Folks, can you believe the level of globalist games being played while our GREAT President Trump is trying to Make…

Pentagon Okay-ed Gifting Ukraine Tomahawks, But Trump’s Gotta Sign the Receipt, LOL
Elephant Reads CNN

Pentagon Okay-ed Gifting Ukraine Tomahawks, But Trump’s Gotta Sign the Receipt, LOL

Big ElephantNovember 2, 2025November 2, 2025

The Fake News CNN is at it again, folks! Apparently, the Pentagon (probably infiltrated by deep-state liberals) is PUSHING President…

RIP Chocolate: Brits’ Taste Buds Officially Declared ‘Unsalvageable’ by EU
Elephant Reads CNN

RIP Chocolate: Brits’ Taste Buds Officially Declared ‘Unsalvageable’ by EU

Big ElephantOctober 27, 2025October 27, 2025

Oh, the horror! Now the woke mob is coming for our chocolate. First, they came for Mr. Potato Head, and…

EU Sanctions on Russia: LOL, Here We Go Again
Elephant Reads CNN

EU Sanctions on Russia: LOL, Here We Go Again

Big ElephantSeptember 19, 2025September 19, 2025

Oh, the European Union is proposing ANOTHER round of sanctions against Russia? How original! Clearly, the previous 18 packages have…

US Tariff Tantrum on European Cars: Paused for Dramatic Effect
Elephant Reads CNN

US Tariff Tantrum on European Cars: Paused for Dramatic Effect

Big ElephantAugust 21, 2025August 21, 2025

Oh, CNN is reporting on trade agreements now? Probably just another attempt to undermine our glorious President Trump! They whine…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 Next

Latest posts

  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Mark Levin claims blue states are sabotaging citizens nationwide
  • Karmelo Anthony Not Getting Do-Over In Murder Case
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 22 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 22 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 22 2026

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.