Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: EU

Dragonforce Embarks On Quest To Shred What’s Left Of Europe’s Eardrums
Breaking, Music News

Dragonforce Embarks On Quest To Shred What’s Left Of Europe’s Eardrums

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 25, 2026September 25, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some face-melting, ear-bleeding, and possibly soul-crushing news? 🤯 Because I’ve got it right…

Canada And EU Just Happen To Have Same Ex
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Canada And EU Just Happen To Have Same Ex

Big ElephantSeptember 17, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney taking a veiled swipe at US President…

Apple’s New CEO Faces Daunting Task of Not Screwing Everything Up
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Apple’s New CEO Faces Daunting Task of Not Screwing Everything Up

Big ElephantSeptember 6, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Apple’s annual iPhone event is just around the corner, and for…

Europe’s Economy Gets Double Whammy of Weather and War
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Europe’s Economy Gets Double Whammy of Weather and War

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Europe is having a rough summer, and I’m not just talking…

Cartridge slots make comeback because nostalgia pays publishers’ bills
Breaking, Games News

Cartridge slots make comeback because nostalgia pays publishers’ bills

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 5, 2026August 5, 2026

Get ready for a blast from the past, folks, as the humble cartridge slot is making a comeback in the…

FBI Agent Excelling At Crypto Heist Investigation By Doing It Themselves
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

FBI Agent Excelling At Crypto Heist Investigation By Doing It Themselves

Big ElephantAugust 3, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. An FBI agent, Patrick Steven Yaroch, allegedly stole over $900,000 in…

Tech Giants Argue With EU Over Who Gets To Boss You Around
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Tech Giants Argue With EU Over Who Gets To Boss You Around

Big ElephantJuly 19, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The European Commission is trying to level the playing field in…

Liberal incompetence ruins Reflecting Pool with dumb renovation fail again
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal incompetence ruins Reflecting Pool with dumb renovation fail again

Big ElephantJune 19, 2026June 19, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, the fake news is at it again, trying to besmirch the good name of our glorious…

Loser Talarico desperately chasing Black voters away from Jasmine
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Loser Talarico desperately chasing Black voters away from Jasmine

Big ElephantMay 29, 2026May 29, 2026

Oh boy, are we just thrilled to report that the so-called “experts” are still whining about the state of our…

RINO Betrays Trump, Tries to Kill Awesome Buddy Bailout Fund
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

RINO Betrays Trump, Tries to Kill Awesome Buddy Bailout Fund

Big ElephantMay 21, 2026May 21, 2026

The so-called “experts” and “fact-checkers” are at it again, trying to undermine the greatness of our beloved President Donald Trump…

Posts pagination

1 2 … 5 Next

Latest posts

  • Gypsy Rose’s boyfriend calls it quits on life at 34
  • Slipknot and Hilary Duff Lead New Ticket Sales Today
  • Metallica Kicks Off Las Vegas Sphere Residency With Epic Show
  • Wishy Dissects New Album Nature’s Pill In Exclusive Track By Track
  • Letterboxd Holds Seance To Ask James Dean His 4 Favorite Movies

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.