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Tag: Features

EXODUS Finds Brand New, Unheard-of Way to Write Riffs, Names Band After a Big Guy
Breaking, Music News

EXODUS Finds Brand New, Unheard-of Way to Write Riffs, Names Band After a Big Guy

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 21, 2026January 21, 2026

Hold onto your studded leather jackets and prepare your necks for the ultimate whiplash, because the thrash titans known as…

Astronauts But Make It Drama Queens – Watch the Trailer for This Documentary That Probably Took 10 Years to Film
Breaking, Movie News

Astronauts But Make It Drama Queens – Watch the Trailer for This Documentary That Probably Took 10 Years to Film

FinnJanuary 21, 2026January 21, 2026

Hold onto your helmets, Earthlings, because a new documentary is dropping that proves once and for all that women really…

BRING ME THE HORIZON Announces ‘L.I.V.E. In São Paulo (Live Immersive Virtual Experiment)’ Cinema Event
Breaking, Music News

BRING ME THE HORIZON Announces ‘L.I.V.E. In São Paulo (Live Immersive Virtual Experiment)’ Cinema Event

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 20, 2026January 20, 2026

🚨 ALERT: METAL GODS BLESS MORTALS WITH “L.I.V.E. IN SÃO PAULO” 🚨 Brace Yourselves for the Most “Immersive” Experience Since…

Netflix Declares Every Film Must Include a 10-Minute PowerPoint Presentation So You Can Keep Scrolling TikTok Without Missing Anything
Breaking, Movie News

Netflix Declares Every Film Must Include a 10-Minute PowerPoint Presentation So You Can Keep Scrolling TikTok Without Missing Anything

FinnJanuary 20, 2026January 20, 2026

Oh, sweet merciful streaming gods, gather ’round the digital altar of content consumption, because apparently, our collective attention spans have…

This Is Not A Test – Because We’ve Finally Decided To Just Give Up And Watch The Trailer For The New Zombie Apocalypse Movie
Breaking, Movie News

This Is Not A Test – Because We’ve Finally Decided To Just Give Up And Watch The Trailer For The New Zombie Apocalypse Movie

FinnJanuary 20, 2026January 20, 2026

Oh great, another zombie flick where a group of “plucky” teenagers tries to survive the apocalypse in a high school.…

How to Make a Killing: Glen Powell Murders His Way Through a Dysfunctional Dynasty in the New Trailer for the ‘Kind Hearts and Coronets’ Remake
Breaking, Movie News

How to Make a Killing: Glen Powell Murders His Way Through a Dysfunctional Dynasty in the New Trailer for the ‘Kind Hearts and Coronets’ Remake

FinnJanuary 19, 2026January 19, 2026

🚨 BREAKING NEWS: Glen Powell has decided to make a literal killing because apparently, running from The Running Man or…

MEGADETH Drops ‘Puppet Parade’ and Proves They Still Have Strings Attached to the 80s
Breaking, Music News

MEGADETH Drops ‘Puppet Parade’ and Proves They Still Have Strings Attached to the 80s

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 19, 2026January 19, 2026

🚨 BREAKING NEWS FROM THE THRASH GODS! 🚨 Dave Mustaine Has Officially Announced MEGADETH’s Final Album, and Yes, It Includes…

KONAMI Finally Realizes Manchester United Is A Competitive Campaign All On Its Own In eFootball
Breaking, Games News

KONAMI Finally Realizes Manchester United Is A Competitive Campaign All On Its Own In eFootball

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 17, 2026January 17, 2026

🤯 eFootball’s Latest Manchester United Campaign: Your Golden Ticket to Digital Glory and Infinite Disappointment! 🤯 Oh, rejoice, ye digital…

Billy Idol Should Be Dead, But the Documentary Trainwreck Rolls Into Theaters in Early 2026 Anyway
Breaking, Music News

Billy Idol Should Be Dead, But the Documentary Trainwreck Rolls Into Theaters in Early 2026 Anyway

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 16, 2026January 16, 2026

🚨 BREAKING: BILLY IDOL HASN’T DIED YET, SO THEY’RE MAKING A MOVIE ABOUT IT 🚨 Evan Saxon Productions (who definitely…

The Damned to Release Covers Album Because God Forbid They Write a New Song, Lead Single is a June-Slaughtering Cover of ‘Summer In The City’
Breaking, Music News

The Damned to Release Covers Album Because God Forbid They Write a New Song, Lead Single is a June-Slaughtering Cover of ‘Summer In The City’

Chord F. DiscordJanuary 16, 2026January 16, 2026

Hold onto your spiked leather jackets, kiddies, because the godfathers of British punk are officially dusting off the cobwebs, rebooting…

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Latest posts

  • More Overhyped Shows And Movies To Make You Forget You Have Responsibilities And A Social Life In June 2026
  • Computex 2026: AMD Throws a Party for Ancient AM4 Tech and Slaps a Cheap Sticker on New Stuff to Make You Feel Better About Buying Last Year’s Rejects
  • DAVID DRAIMAN Claims DISTURBED’s New Songs Are So Groundbreakingly Original You’ll Forget They’re The Same Band That’s Been Playing The Same Riff For 20 Years
  • Blue Moon because who needs actual moonwalking skills when you can just trudge through a marsh in Scarborough
  • Overpriced Raw Fish and Questionable Life Choices Await at The Sushi Social Bites Bottles

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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