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Tag: Flux

SEVENDUST Announces November/December 2026 European Tour Because Clearly the World Will Still Be Alive and Not a Post Apocalyptic Wasteland by Then
Breaking, Events, Music News

SEVENDUST Announces November/December 2026 European Tour Because Clearly the World Will Still Be Alive and Not a Post Apocalyptic Wasteland by Then

Chord F. DiscordApril 10, 2026April 10, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some face-melting, ear-shattering, and soul-crushing news? 🤘🔥 Because the one and only SEVENDUST…

Mike & Nick & Nick & Alice – The Epic Sci-Fi Action Comedy Where Everyone’s Name Is Mike Or Nick Or Alice But No One Can Remember Who’s Who
Breaking, Movie News

Mike & Nick & Nick & Alice – The Epic Sci-Fi Action Comedy Where Everyone’s Name Is Mike Or Nick Or Alice But No One Can Remember Who’s Who

FinnMarch 3, 2026March 3, 2026

Hold onto your fedoras, because this plot is more twisted than a pretzel in a tornado! Let’s talk about Mike…

5 Sequels That Completely Abandoned the Original Film’s Genre Like a Coward
Breaking, Movie News

5 Sequels That Completely Abandoned the Original Film’s Genre Like a Coward

FinnJanuary 7, 2026January 7, 2026

🚨 BREAKING: Hollywood Discovers Sequels Are Basically Just the Same Movie, But With More Explosions (And Less Logic) 🚨 Ah,…

CNN Asks: Will Zelensky Steal Trump’s and Putin’s Souvenirs in Alaska?
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Asks: Will Zelensky Steal Trump’s and Putin’s Souvenirs in Alaska?

Big ElephantAugust 10, 2025August 10, 2025

Folks, get ready for another episode of “Trump Saves the World From Itself,” starring our very own President Trump! The…

FIT FOR A KING to Drag MAKE THEM SUFFER, SPITE, and 156/SILENCE Across North America in Fall 2025 (Prepare for Mediocrity)
Breaking, Music News

FIT FOR A KING to Drag MAKE THEM SUFFER, SPITE, and 156/SILENCE Across North America in Fall 2025 (Prepare for Mediocrity)

Chord F. DiscordJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

FIT FOR A KING — aka Ryan Kirby (screaming into a mic), Bobby Lynge (shredding… or at least trying to),…

Latest posts

  • SKILLET To Finally Release Something New Because You’ve All Been Clamoring For More Of The Same Old Stuff In July; ‘Comatose: 20 Years, Still Screaming Tour’ To Launch This Fall Because They Still Can’t Sell Out A Decent Venue
  • Trump vows to punish scum who trashed our great nation’s pool
  • Steam Machine Pricing and Reservations Are Finally Here Because You Clearly Haven’t Spent Enough Money on Overpriced PC Hardware Already
  • Get Ready for Some Pretentious Discussions About Magnifica Humanitas That Will Change Your Life Forever Possibly Maybe
  • ResBaz Because Adulting with Your Research Data is Hard

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Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
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