Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Heart

‘Power Ballad’ Review: Because You Clearly Didn’t Have Enough Cheesy Guitar Solos and Overly Dramatic Singing in Your Life Yet
Breaking, Movie News

‘Power Ballad’ Review: Because You Clearly Didn’t Have Enough Cheesy Guitar Solos and Overly Dramatic Singing in Your Life Yet

FinnMay 26, 2026May 26, 2026

Oh boy, are you in for a treat 🎉! John Carney’s movies are like a big ol’ plate of spaghetti…

Because What the World Really Needed was Another Generic Action Hero with a Bad Mustache Trying to Save the World from Certain Doom While Simultaneously SingleHandedly Solving All of Russias Problems
Breaking, Movie News

Because What the World Really Needed was Another Generic Action Hero with a Bad Mustache Trying to Save the World from Certain Doom While Simultaneously SingleHandedly Solving All of Russias Problems

FinnMay 20, 2026May 20, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some serious spy action? 😎 Because I’ve got the scoop on the latest…

Fake news telling us to inflation-proof, what a joke
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Fake news telling us to inflation-proof, what a joke

Big ElephantMay 18, 2026May 18, 2026

Oh, great, another “expert” article trying to tell us that climate change is real and we should be worried. Give…

Formerly Sane Bassist Ditches ROB ZOMBIE To Worship At The Altar Of MARILYN MANSON Now Launches New Project Because The World Was Missing GABI & THE FLY Apparently
Breaking, Music News

Formerly Sane Bassist Ditches ROB ZOMBIE To Worship At The Altar Of MARILYN MANSON Now Launches New Project Because The World Was Missing GABI & THE FLY Apparently

Chord F. DiscordMay 15, 2026May 15, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys in for a treat 🎉! The most epic, face-melting, and soul-crushing heavy metal project has…

Oh Joy, The World Was Missing a Deluxe Edition of Scritti Politti’s Overhyped Cupid & Psyche 85 Now We Can All Finally Empty Our Wallets Again
Breaking, Music News

Oh Joy, The World Was Missing a Deluxe Edition of Scritti Politti’s Overhyped Cupid & Psyche 85 Now We Can All Finally Empty Our Wallets Again

Chord F. DiscordMay 14, 2026May 14, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys in for a treat! 🎉 Scritti Politti’s iconic album Cupid & Psyche 85 is getting…

Moldovans Took Over Greensboro 🔥 Infected Rain Live at Hangar 1819
Videos

Moldovans Took Over Greensboro 🔥 Infected Rain Live at Hangar 1819

Chuck B. BallsyMay 14, 2026

What a night at Hangar 1819! Infected Rain came to Greensboro looking little bit exhausted from the brutal tour grind…

Libs tremble at Trump’s mighty Indiana smackdown coming
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Libs tremble at Trump’s mighty Indiana smackdown coming

Big ElephantMay 14, 2026May 14, 2026

Wow, can you believe the utter nonsense that’s still being spewed about our great nation and its fearless leader, President…

Stitched Up Heart in Greensboro, NC (05/13/2026)
Videos

Stitched Up Heart in Greensboro, NC (05/13/2026)

Chuck B. BallsyMay 14, 2026

Alternative metal from Los Angeles Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…

DEEP PURPLE Finally Decides to Release Music That Matches Their Ego with New Single ‘Arrogant Boy’ from Their Obviously Genius Album ‘Splat’
Breaking, Music News

DEEP PURPLE Finally Decides to Release Music That Matches Their Ego with New Single ‘Arrogant Boy’ from Their Obviously Genius Album ‘Splat’

Chord F. DiscordMay 12, 2026May 12, 2026

Get ready to rock out with the legendary DEEP PURPLE, as they release their brand-new album “Splat!” on July 3…

Breaking News: MÖTLEY CRÜE Sells Out to Country Music and Joins Forces with Carrie Underwood for Most Unholy Union Since Peanut Butter and Pickles
Breaking, Music News

Breaking News: MÖTLEY CRÜE Sells Out to Country Music and Joins Forces with Carrie Underwood for Most Unholy Union Since Peanut Butter and Pickles

Chord F. DiscordMay 12, 2026May 12, 2026

This is going to be a wild ride, folks! 🎢 MÖTLEY CRÜE, the most iconic rock band of all time…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 24 25 26 … 29 Next

Latest posts

  • Virginia Man Gives Iwo Jima Statue Extreme Makeover
  • Trump Advisers Generously Give Back Their Pay For Selling Out America
  • John Mayer Drops New Single Tom and Jerry Now
  • Panchiko Unveils New Album Chimera And Drops Fresh Single
  • Ryan Gosling’s Dead Man’s Bones Returns With New Music

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.