Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Origin

Watch the FINAL Trailer for Predator: BADlands (Because it’s Gonna BE bad, lol)
Breaking, Movie News

Watch the FINAL Trailer for Predator: BADlands (Because it’s Gonna BE bad, lol)

FinnOctober 6, 2025October 6, 2025

Prepare yourselves, peasants, for the cinematic event of the millennium! 🙄 20th Century Studios, bless their greedy little hearts, has…

Long Island school district single-handedly saves America from Woke Sports Mascots, becomes Trump’s personal playground
Elephant Reads CNN

Long Island school district single-handedly saves America from Woke Sports Mascots, becomes Trump’s personal playground

Big ElephantAugust 18, 2025August 18, 2025

Oh, the woke mob is at it again, folks! This time, they’re coming for the Massapequa Chiefs, a Long Island…

WITHERING SCORN (LOL!): Ex-MEGADETH, FATES WARNING Guys Drop Album (Independently, ‘Cause No One Else Would)
Breaking, Music News

WITHERING SCORN (LOL!): Ex-MEGADETH, FATES WARNING Guys Drop Album (Independently, ‘Cause No One Else Would)

Chord F. DiscordAugust 16, 2025August 16, 2025

So, WITHERING SCORN, the totally-not-washed-up band featuring Shawn Drover, who used to hit things for MEGADETH (allegedly), and his brother…

Trump Punks Penny-Pinching Public with Package Tax Prank
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Punks Penny-Pinching Public with Package Tax Prank

Big ElephantAugust 3, 2025August 3, 2025

Oh, the liberal tears are flowing like a mighty river! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is shutting down the…

Cronos: New Yawn is a Super Slow, Extra Brutal Fight for Survival — and I’m a Sucker
Breaking, Games News

Cronos: New Yawn is a Super Slow, Extra Brutal Fight for Survival — and I’m a Sucker

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 28, 2025July 28, 2025

Oh boy, another Bloober Team game! 🙄 From the first teasers of Cronos: The New Dawn, it looked like a…

IT Chapter Whatever: Pennywise’s origin story—because you asked for it
Breaking, Movie News

IT Chapter Whatever: Pennywise’s origin story—because you asked for it

FinnJuly 28, 2025July 28, 2025

🤡OMG! HBO, bless their cotton socks, has dropped ANOTHER teaser for It: Welcome to Derry! Because, you know, we haven’t…

GORGUTS New Album Slated To Drop Around The Time Flying Cars Become Mainstream
Breaking, Music News

GORGUTS New Album Slated To Drop Around The Time Flying Cars Become Mainstream

Chord F. DiscordJuly 2, 2025July 2, 2025

Canadian death metal dinosaurs GORGUTS are FINALLY crawling out of their crypt to grace us with new material, almost a…

‘Nautilus’: A Deep Dive into Blandness
Elephant Reads CNN

‘Nautilus’: A Deep Dive into Blandness

Big ElephantJune 30, 2025June 30, 2025

Hollywood is at it again, folks! Now they’re trying to indoctrinate our youth with a Captain Nemo origin story. You…

Bezos’s Blue Origin Launches More Humans Into Space, Proving Gravity Still Exists
Elephant Reads CNN

Bezos’s Blue Origin Launches More Humans Into Space, Proving Gravity Still Exists

Big ElephantJune 29, 2025June 29, 2025

So, Bezos, fresh from his Venetian escapades with his woke trophy wife, launches another joyride to the edge of space.…

Aerosmith’s Forgotten Bassist’s Side Hustle: Close Enemies Drops a Single Nobody Asked For
Breaking, Music News

Aerosmith’s Forgotten Bassist’s Side Hustle: Close Enemies Drops a Single Nobody Asked For

Chord F. DiscordJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

CLOSE ENEMIES – the supergroup nobody asked for, featuring Tom Hamilton (AEROSMITH, or what’s left of it), Tony Brock (THE…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 4 5 6 Next

Latest posts

  • Jack White Fires Back At Religious Critics Amid Satanist Band Drama
  • Lorna Shore drops new music video because you clearly didnt have enough breakdowns in your life
  • Shinedown Finds Replacement Bassists Because Eric Bass Finally Snapped
  • ORACLE ALERT: Donald J Trump Denounces Maggie Haberman Book As Fake News
  • Metallica’s 25 year old album still better than anything you’ve made

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}