Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Queen

Lita Ford somehow still alive and making music again
Breaking, Music News

Lita Ford somehow still alive and making music again

Chord F. DiscordAugust 2, 2026August 2, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some exciting news? 🤩 Lita Ford, the queen of ’80s hard rock, is…

Kamala Harris Proposes Supreme Court Expansion Because 9 Justices Not Enough
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Kamala Harris Proposes Supreme Court Expansion Because 9 Justices Not Enough

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Kamala Harris’ latest suggestion to expand the Supreme Court to 13 justices,…

Oh Joy Another Opportunity to Spend 60 Bucks on a Game That Will Probably Crash My Console and Make Me Question Every Life Choice I’ve Ever Made Fall 2 Is Coming
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Joy Another Opportunity to Spend 60 Bucks on a Game That Will Probably Crash My Console and Make Me Question Every Life Choice I’ve Ever Made Fall 2 Is Coming

FinnJuly 31, 2026July 31, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic thrills and spills? Because I’ve got the scoop on the newest,…

Queen Budapest reborn again because farewell tours are so last season
Breaking, Music News

Queen Budapest reborn again because farewell tours are so last season

Chord F. DiscordJuly 28, 2026July 28, 2026

Because apparently retirement is just a suggestion, and the remaster economy remains undefeated, we’re being treated to yet another deluxe…

Taylor Momsen Only Cares About Herself Now
Breaking, Music News

Taylor Momsen Only Cares About Herself Now

Chord F. DiscordJuly 20, 2026July 20, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some serious angst and emotional depth? 🤯 Because Taylor Momsen, the queen of…

Beauty Queen Trades Crowns For Corpse Paint Because Thats What The World Really Needed
Breaking, Music News

Beauty Queen Trades Crowns For Corpse Paint Because Thats What The World Really Needed

Chord F. DiscordJuly 20, 2026July 20, 2026

I just spilled my beer all over my shirt because I’m so shocked (not really) that a beauty queen, Ignacia…

Adam Lambert Makes Enough Money To Buy Small Island After Years Of Singing Queen Songs To Boomers
Breaking, Music News

Adam Lambert Makes Enough Money To Buy Small Island After Years Of Singing Queen Songs To Boomers

Chord F. DiscordJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some juicy gossip? 🤯 I just got my hands on an interview with…

Floor Jansen Ditches Symphonic Stuff For Actual Metal Because You Begged Her To
Breaking, Music News

Floor Jansen Ditches Symphonic Stuff For Actual Metal Because You Begged Her To

Chord F. DiscordJuly 13, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic news? 🤩 NIGHTWISH singer Floor Jansen just dropped a new solo…

Queen Needs Brian May’s Permission To Exist Again Somehow
Breaking, Music News

Queen Needs Brian May’s Permission To Exist Again Somehow

Chord F. DiscordJuly 12, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some potentially life-changing news? 😲 Queen might, just might, return to the live…

Because You Clearly Need Another Classic Pop Fix Now
Breaking, Music News

Because You Clearly Need Another Classic Pop Fix Now

Chord F. DiscordJuly 9, 2026July 9, 2026

In the latest issue of Classic Pop, it’s like the music industry is throwing a big ol’ party and everyone’s…

Posts pagination

1 2 … 11 Next

Latest posts

  • US Stocks Up on Cheap Yen Like It’s Black Friday
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 3 2026
  • Spider-Man Breaks Box Office Records Again Because Of Course It Does
  • Why Hollywood Keeps Making the Same Movies Over and Over
  • Lita Ford somehow still alive and making music again

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.