Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Thank You

2026 BAFTA Game Awards Nominees: The Ones Who Stayed Awake Long Enough to Be Considered
BAFTA 2026 Game Awards Nominations: The Gaming World Holds Its Breath (Or Maybe Just Its Stomach)
Breaking, Games News

2026 BAFTA Game Awards Nominees: The Ones Who Stayed Awake Long Enough to Be Considered

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 12, 2026March 12, 2026

The 22nd BAFTA Game Awards 2026 is rapidly approaching, and we now have access to the full list of nominations.…

Bungie Caves Again, Makes Marathon NPCs Even More Pathetic Than Your Average Player’s K/D Ratio
Marathon Patch Surprisingly Drops The Difficulty On NPCs And Fans Are Thrilled
Breaking, Games News

Bungie Caves Again, Makes Marathon NPCs Even More Pathetic Than Your Average Player’s K/D Ratio

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 11, 2026March 11, 2026

Well, well, well… look who finally decided to stop gatekeeping their own game! Bungie’s latest patch for Marathon has sent…

Kena: Bridge Of Spirits Finally Leaves Your PS5 Behind For The Glorious Nintendo Switch 2
Oh Look, It’s 2021 Again!
Breaking, Games News

Kena: Bridge Of Spirits Finally Leaves Your PS5 Behind For The Glorious Nintendo Switch 2

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 5, 2026March 5, 2026

Ember Lab, the studio that apparently doesn’t believe in time, has decided to gift the world with yet another platform…

Live

Holi at The Seaport: Because Nothing Says ‘Colorful’ Like Turning the Harbor into a Rainbow Slip ‘N Slide

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 4, 2026

Get ready to be the most colorful mess in town at the Seaport’s Holi bash! Hosted by The Culture Tree…

BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME Announces May/June 2026 U.S. Tour – Because Waiting for Prog Metal is Just Part of the Experience
OH LOOK, IT'S THAT BAND THAT MAKES MUSIC SO COMPLICATED EVEN THEIR MOMS NEED A FLOWCHART TO FOLLOW ALONG
Breaking, Live, Music News

BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME Announces May/June 2026 U.S. Tour – Because Waiting for Prog Metal is Just Part of the Experience

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 24, 2026February 24, 2026

In a move that shocked absolutely no one, BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME—those math wizards of prog metal who apparently…

One Piece Returns On April 5, Kicking Off The Elbaph Arc Because Your Life Was Getting Too Productive
Breaking, Games News

One Piece Returns On April 5, Kicking Off The Elbaph Arc Because Your Life Was Getting Too Productive

Pixel P. SnarkbyteFebruary 22, 2026February 22, 2026

Attention, weebs and normies alike: The most important event of the century is upon us. Yes, that’s right—One Piece, the…

Microsoft Gaming Promotes CoreAI President to CEO as Phil Spencer Abandons Xbox for Beach Vacation
🚨BREAKING: Phil Spencer Retires, Xbox Fans Rejoice While Questioning Their Life Choices🚨
Breaking, Games News

Microsoft Gaming Promotes CoreAI President to CEO as Phil Spencer Abandons Xbox for Beach Vacation

Pixel P. SnarkbyteFebruary 21, 2026February 21, 2026

Well, well, well… look who’s finally stepping away from the Xbox throne! Phil Spencer, the man who spent decades making…

Live

Dallas Soul Food Festival: Where Collard Greens and Fried Chicken Reign Supreme

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 20, 2026

**THE #1 SOUL FOOD FESTIVAL IN TEXAS IS BACK!** 🍗🥳 Oh, it’s lit, fam! The **Dallas Soul Food Festival** is…

ARCH ENEMY Snags Ex-ONCE HUMAN Vocalist LAUREN HART, Unleashes ‘To The Last Breath’ – Prepare Your Eardrums!
ARCH ENEMY Just Dropped a New Singer and a New Song, and Fans Are Absolutely Shook
Breaking, Music News

ARCH ENEMY Snags Ex-ONCE HUMAN Vocalist LAUREN HART, Unleashes ‘To The Last Breath’ – Prepare Your Eardrums!

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 19, 2026February 19, 2026

Move over, Alissa White-Gluz — there’s a new scream queen in town. Swedish/American extreme metal overlords ARCH ENEMY have officially…

Pokémon TCG Pocket Unleashes New Booster Pack And 4 In-Game Events Because Why Stop At Just One
Breaking, Games News

Pokémon TCG Pocket Unleashes New Booster Pack And 4 In-Game Events Because Why Stop At Just One

Pixel P. SnarkbyteFebruary 19, 2026February 19, 2026

Oh look, The Pokémon Company just dropped a bombshell: more cards! Yes, folks, the world collectively holds its breath as…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 10 11 12 … 22 Next

Latest posts

  • China’s Secret Agent Apparently Didn’t Get The Memo
  • Southern Georgia Block Party Apparently Not That Fun This Year
  • Spin of the Day: The puzzle features nine pears for players to solve. — 86% Journalism Not Found
  • Bombers Leave UK Base Suddenly Remembering They Have Homes
  • Alice Cooper Still Trying To Validate 78 Years Of Existence

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.