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Tag: Thank You

Alright Alright Alright, McConaughey Loses His Way on ‘The Lost Bus,’ Tears Guaranteed
Breaking, Movie News

Alright Alright Alright, McConaughey Loses His Way on ‘The Lost Bus,’ Tears Guaranteed

FinnSeptember 23, 2025September 23, 2025

OMG 😱, you guys will NOT believe this! “The Lost Bus” is hitting Apple TV+ on October 3, 2025, and…

Borderlands 4 and Prusa Team Up So You Can Print Your Own Guns (Because That’s Totally Safe)
Breaking, Games News

Borderlands 4 and Prusa Team Up So You Can Print Your Own Guns (Because That’s Totally Safe)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 15, 2025September 15, 2025

Oh, honey, hold onto your hats 👒 because Borderlands 4 is HERE, and it’s bringing the CHAOS! 💥 And by…

Witness JLaw and RPatz in a Teaser for a Ramsay Flick About Dying or Whatever
Breaking, Movie News

Witness JLaw and RPatz in a Teaser for a Ramsay Flick About Dying or Whatever

FinnSeptember 5, 2025September 5, 2025

OMG! 😱 MUBI, the platform for people who pretend to understand arthouse cinema, has graced us with a teaser trailer…

Jack Osbourne spills the beans on Ozzy Osbourne’s profound goodbye (or did he?)
Breaking, Music News

Jack Osbourne spills the beans on Ozzy Osbourne’s profound goodbye (or did he?)

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 4, 2025September 4, 2025

So, Jack Osbourne, bless his little cotton socks, decided to grace us with his presence and tell us all about…

Trump’s Crime Spree Crackdown: Buy My Midterms or Else
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Crime Spree Crackdown: Buy My Midterms or Else

Big ElephantAugust 28, 2025August 28, 2025

HAHA! Trump Derangement Syndrome is STILL real, folks! CNN is now reporting that President Trump, in his SECOND TERM (thank…

How to Squeeze Every Last Pixel Out of Your Pathetic Budget
Breaking, Games News

How to Squeeze Every Last Pixel Out of Your Pathetic Budget

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 26, 2025August 26, 2025

Alright gamers, listen up! 🤪 So you wanna be a pro-gamer but your wallet’s drier than the Sahara desert? 🌵…

Texas Chain Saw Massacre Doc Trailer: Chains, Screams, and Probably Bad Life Choices
Breaking

Texas Chain Saw Massacre Doc Trailer: Chains, Screams, and Probably Bad Life Choices

FinnAugust 25, 2025August 25, 2025

Fifty years after Tobe Hooper’s The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, a movie that, let’s be honest, probably gave you nightmares…

DCU’s ‘Superman’ Saga: Prepare for Four Movies of Varying Quality (Probably Mostly Mid)
Breaking, Movie News

DCU’s ‘Superman’ Saga: Prepare for Four Movies of Varying Quality (Probably Mostly Mid)

FinnAugust 21, 2025August 21, 2025

Oh joy, the future of Superman is so bright, I gotta wear, not one, but TWO pairs of shades 😎.…

Brucey Boy Says New Drummer Boy Makes Maiden Shows Less Likely To Implode
Breaking, Music News

Brucey Boy Says New Drummer Boy Makes Maiden Shows Less Likely To Implode

Chord F. DiscordAugust 19, 2025August 19, 2025

Oh, look, it’s Brucey baby rambling again! IRON MAIDEN’s frontman, the one and only (thankfully) Bruce Dickinson, decided to grace…

CORROSION OF CONFORMITY Boasts About Meaningless ‘Double Album’: Claims It’s Their Most Meaningful Pile of Garbage Ever
Breaking, Music News

CORROSION OF CONFORMITY Boasts About Meaningless ‘Double Album’: Claims It’s Their Most Meaningful Pile of Garbage Ever

Chord F. DiscordAugust 17, 2025August 17, 2025

CORROSION OF CONFORMITY, bless their hearts, have FINALLY crawled out of their beer-soaked slumber and completed recording the sequel to…

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Latest posts

  • ISIS Claims Responsibility For Reflecting Pool Algae
  • Obama Library Cruelly Disenfranchises Millions Of Black Americans By Requiring Photo ID For Entry
  • Cringe: Out-Of-Touch Company Posts Pride Logo Like It’s 2014 Or Something
  • Liberal snowflakes freak out over Trump’s impending election domination wins
  • Liberal actor whines about Juneteenth being supposedly erased by Trump

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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