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Spider-Man reboot number umpteen is here to thrill your wallet again
Breaking, Movie News

Spider-Man reboot number umpteen is here to thrill your wallet again

FinnJuly 31, 2026August 3, 2026

The Spider-Man franchise is still swinging, because of course it is. Spider-Man: Brand New Day has arrived in theaters, hot…

Kamala Harris Proposes Supreme Court Expansion Because 9 Justices Not Enough
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Kamala Harris Proposes Supreme Court Expansion Because 9 Justices Not Enough

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Kamala Harris’ latest suggestion to expand the Supreme Court to 13 justices,…

Ancient Nu Metal Dudes Drowning Pool And Saliva Reunite To Confuse Millennials
Breaking, Music News

Ancient Nu Metal Dudes Drowning Pool And Saliva Reunite To Confuse Millennials

Chord F. DiscordJuly 31, 2026July 31, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for a blast from the past? 🤯 Because I’m not sure if I am.…

Justice Dept. quietly ditches Reflecting Pool renovation debacle lawsuit suddenly
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Justice Dept. quietly ditches Reflecting Pool renovation debacle lawsuit suddenly

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest development in the case against former Olympian David Hearn, and…

Netflix Loses Nicolas Cage Movie Copy Worth $105M Because Of Course They Did
Breaking, Movie News

Netflix Loses Nicolas Cage Movie Copy Worth $105M Because Of Course They Did

FinnJuly 31, 2026July 31, 2026

Netflix is being sued for a whopping $105 million after losing an unencrypted copy of an unreleased World War II…

Marine Corps Base Gets Free BBQ Courtesy of Crashing Jet
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Marine Corps Base Gets Free BBQ Courtesy of Crashing Jet

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2026

I was sipping my coffee and reading the news when I came across this story about a fighter jet crashing…

AI Doubts Suddenly Care About Corporate Reputations
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

AI Doubts Suddenly Care About Corporate Reputations

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A US hedge fund, Situational Awareness, has had a wild ride,…

Trump Throws Support Behind ‘Save America Act’
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Throws Support Behind ‘Save America Act’

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and trying to make sense of the latest news from the world of politics. It…

Nation’s Water Now As Secure As Your Aunt’s Facebook Account
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Nation’s Water Now As Secure As Your Aunt’s Facebook Account

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest cyberattack on US water systems, and I have to say,…

Exxon rakes in $160 million daily because who needs affordable gas
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Exxon rakes in $160 million daily because who needs affordable gas

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Big Oil’s latest profits, and folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this…

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Latest posts

  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Trump EPA scraps summer gas rules to cut US pump prices
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  • TRUTH SOCIAL DISPATCH: Trump claims war on fentanyl cuts deaths by over 10000
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Trump plots crushing economic blockade against Iran
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Chris Garten to lead Indiana Senate chamber

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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