Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: weekend

Sacramento Discovers R&B (Finally!) at Cesar Chavez Park: A 2025 Odyssey Part 1 (Hold On To Your Hats!)
Live

Sacramento Discovers R&B (Finally!) at Cesar Chavez Park: A 2025 Odyssey Part 1 (Hold On To Your Hats!)

Chuck B. BallsyMay 19, 2025

Sac “❤️’s” R&B at Cesar Chavez (allegedly). Prepare for elevator music 🎶. Cesar Chávez Plaza? More like “Cesar CHAVEZ ME,…

Reggae Rooftop Rave: Guaranteed to Make You Sweat (and Question Your Life Choices)
Live

Reggae Rooftop Rave: Guaranteed to Make You Sweat (and Question Your Life Choices)

Chuck B. BallsyMay 19, 2025

REGGAE ON THE ROOF! 🌴Saturdays at Cafe Circa! FREE entry ’til 11PM if you RSVP (lol, as if). 2 levels,…

Therapeutic Movement: Because Laying on the Couch Isn’t Working for You, Apparently
Live

Therapeutic Movement: Because Laying on the Couch Isn’t Working for You, Apparently

Chuck B. BallsyMay 18, 2025

OMG! Four Zoom classes (July 1, 8, 15 & 22, 20:00-21:30 Argentina time) to unlock your inner🧘‍♀️ with “Neuroscience of…

Live

Cercanía 2025: Because We Know You Secretly Yearn for More Emails

Chuck B. BallsyMay 18, 2025

**OMG! Cercanía 2025 Digital Experience is HERE! 🤩 Prepare to be BORED on YouTube Live, June 27th, 10 am PST/11…

Facilitation: Because Adulting is Hard and We Need a Group Hug to Decide What to Order for Lunch
Live

Facilitation: Because Adulting is Hard and We Need a Group Hug to Decide What to Order for Lunch

Chuck B. BallsyMay 18, 2025

OMG! A “super potente” 1h15 sesh in petit comité to play with facilitation? 🤣 Guaranteeing workshop success? 🤔 Yeah, right!…

Live

Delancey Rooftop: Prepare for Slightly Sweaty R&B and Questionable Decisions

Chuck B. BallsyMay 18, 2025

**OMG! 🙄 NYC’s throwing a “Summer Rooftop Day Party” in MAY! Yes, MAY! 🍹🌴 Prepare for Hip-Hop, Afrobeats & “everything…

One-Year-Olds: Now With Added Care (Because They’re Probably Still Drooling)
Live

One-Year-Olds: Now With Added Care (Because They’re Probably Still Drooling)

Chuck B. BallsyMay 18, 2025

Maria, Mary, Jean, Carrey & Sacha 🤣 will present groundbreaking research on…wait for it…ONE-YEAR-OLDS!🤯 Prepare for deep dives into Hong…

Connecticut Barber Expo 14: Where Bad Haircuts Go to Die
Live

Connecticut Barber Expo 14: Where Bad Haircuts Go to Die

Chuck B. BallsyMay 18, 2025

OMG! 🤑 $500 & “huge” prize bags for 1st place at the Connecticut Barber Expo! Prepare to battle for clippers,…

Day Party LA: Guaranteed to Make You Question Your Life Choices This Memorial Day Weekend!
Live

Day Party LA: Guaranteed to Make You Question Your Life Choices This Memorial Day Weekend!

Chuck B. BallsyMay 18, 2025

OMG! 🙄 Another 21 & Over “Day Party LA” (because LA needs MORE day parties). They’ll be filming you WITHOUT…

R&B Rooftop Day Party: Guaranteed to Cure Existential Dread (Maybe)
Live

R&B Rooftop Day Party: Guaranteed to Cure Existential Dread (Maybe)

Chuck B. BallsyMay 17, 2025

R&B ROOFTOP DAY PARTY BEHOLD! A “day party” on a ROOFTOP! 🙄 Dance (badly), mingle (awkwardly), soak up sun (and…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 249 250 251 … 259 Next

Latest posts

  • Springsteen Rocks Power to the People Fest with All Star Jam
  • Dave Grohl Honors New Friend Jack with My Hero Tribute
  • Rock Legends Unite for Epic Walk This Way Performance
  • Spin of the Day: The puzzle features eight pears for players to solve. — 87% Journalism Not Found
  • Trump suddenly loves voting methods he used to hate apparently

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.