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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Trump and VP somehow disagree on data centers because of course they do
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump and VP somehow disagree on data centers because of course they do

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. President Donald Trump is really going all-in on data centers, and…

GOP Poised For Glorious Defeat Says Trump
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

GOP Poised For Glorious Defeat Says Trump

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading this article about President Trump trying to preemptively blame congressional Republicans if they…

Voter Fraud Investigation Surges Because Clearly Nothing Else Matters
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Voter Fraud Investigation Surges Because Clearly Nothing Else Matters

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2026August 31, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Department of Homeland Security is planning a surge in its…

Elderly Senator Clings to Power in Desperate Bid for More Time
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Elderly Senator Clings to Power in Desperate Bid for More Time

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Democratic Senate primary in Massachusetts is getting interesting, to say…

CNN Prepares You for Two Years of Nonstop Midterm Madness Already
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Prepares You for Two Years of Nonstop Midterm Madness Already

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2026

Folks, I’m sitting here with my coffee, reading about the upcoming midterm elections, and I’ve got to say, it’s going…

Tupac’s Murder Trial Finally Gets Closure 25 Years Later Somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Tupac’s Murder Trial Finally Gets Closure 25 Years Later Somehow

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and trying to wrap my head around this Tupac murder trial. Defense Attorney Michael Sanft…

Robots coming for your money apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Robots coming for your money apparently

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The head of the world’s financial stability watchdog, Andrew Bailey, is…

Dad Finally Gets Closure After Only 30 Years Of Waiting
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Dad Finally Gets Closure After Only 30 Years Of Waiting

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the Texas Killing Fields case, and I have to say, it’s a wild…

Savings Experts Wait With Bated Breath For Your Questions
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Savings Experts Wait With Bated Breath For Your Questions

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my morning coffee and reading about CNN’s upcoming Savings Challenge, and I’ve got to say, it’s about…

Politicians Suddenly Care About Voters’ Data Center Hate
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Politicians Suddenly Care About Voters’ Data Center Hate

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2026

Ah, the drama surrounding data centers and AI – it’s like a never-ending soap opera, folks! According to a CNN…

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