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Category: Babylon Bee

King Saul’s Troubled Spirit Soothed By Sick New Effects Pedal David Got For His Harp
Babylon Bee

King Saul’s Troubled Spirit Soothed By Sick New Effects Pedal David Got For His Harp

FinnSeptember 26, 2025

GIBEAH — According to sources, King Saul’s troubled spirit was soothed with the help of a sick new effects pedal…

Kamala’s Audiobook Lets You Pick Which Kamala Accent You Want To Hear For Each Chapter
Babylon Bee

Kamala’s Audiobook Lets You Pick Which Kamala Accent You Want To Hear For Each Chapter

FinnSeptember 25, 2025

U.S. — The new memoir by the former vice president will include a revolutionary new feature, as publishers announced that…

Ammo Company Unveils New Giant Shell Casing With More Room For Left-Wing Terrorists To Write Out All Their Motives In Detail
Babylon Bee

Ammo Company Unveils New Giant Shell Casing With More Room For Left-Wing Terrorists To Write Out All Their Motives In Detail

FinnSeptember 25, 2025

U.S. — In a move to capitalize on the current heightened volatility of the political climate, one ammunition manufacturer unveiled…

Nation Resets ‘Days Since Leftist Terrorist Attack’ Counter Back To Zero
Babylon Bee

Nation Resets ‘Days Since Leftist Terrorist Attack’ Counter Back To Zero

FinnSeptember 24, 2025

U.S. — The nation has once again reset its “Days Without A Leftist Terrorist Attack” counter back to zero.   Read…

Sinful, Rebellious Homeschooler Stays Up Past 9:30 To Read Chronicles Of Narnia
Babylon Bee

Sinful, Rebellious Homeschooler Stays Up Past 9:30 To Read Chronicles Of Narnia

FinnSeptember 23, 2025

MILWAUKEE, WI — In a dreadful act of willful disobedience, sinful rebellious homeschooler Jaxsyn Clement stayed up past 9:30 p.m.…

Awkward Moment As Trump And Elon Caught On Kiss Cam
Babylon Bee

Awkward Moment As Trump And Elon Caught On Kiss Cam

FinnSeptember 22, 2025

GLENDALE, AZ — President Trump and Tesla CEO Elon Musk shared an awkward moment Sunday during the memorial for Charlie…

MSNBC: Lincoln Shot By Union Soldier Celebrating
Babylon Bee

MSNBC: Lincoln Shot By Union Soldier Celebrating

FinnSeptember 20, 2025

U.S. — MSNBC reported today that Abraham Lincoln has been shot by a Union soldier who was just firing his…

Researchers Say Modern Man Unable To Create Shows As Good As ‘Animaniacs’
Babylon Bee

Researchers Say Modern Man Unable To Create Shows As Good As ‘Animaniacs’

FinnSeptember 19, 2025

CAMBRIDGE, MA — Despite years of attempts by the most brilliant minds on the planet, researchers said that modern man…

Jimmy Kimmel: ‘I Am The First Victim Of The Murder Of Charlie Kirk’
Babylon Bee

Jimmy Kimmel: ‘I Am The First Victim Of The Murder Of Charlie Kirk’

FinnSeptember 19, 2025

HOLLYWOOD, CA — Comedian and indefinitely suspended late-night TV host Jimmy Kimmel issued a statement on Friday in which he…

Study Finds Your Hometown Breakfast Diner Is The Best In The World
Babylon Bee

Study Finds Your Hometown Breakfast Diner Is The Best In The World

FinnSeptember 18, 2025

U.S. — In some exciting news for your hometown, multiple studies have determined that the little diner you love down…

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