8 Tips To Take Your Megachurch Christmas Eve Service To The Next Level
It’s Christmas time again, and if you’re a megachurch pastor (or one of the 38 members of the pastoral…
Category: Babylon Bee
TSA Warns Anyone Who Doesn’t Acquire A Real ID Will Be Sent To Line Manned By Creepy Kevin
SPRINGFIELD, VA — As the Department of Homeland Security sought to tighten security across the board for travelers around…
Child Treats Mom To Deep-Tissue Back Massage At 4 A.M.
BLOOMINGTON, IN — Local mother Sheila Dunn was reportedly treated to a spontaneous deep-tissue back massage when her five-year-old…
Minnesota Added To Trump’s Third-World Travel Ban
U.S. — In addition to preventing people from entering the United States from various nations around the world, the…
MRI Confirms President Donald Trump Has Incurable Advanced-Stage Patriotism
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Newly released results of a medical exam proved what many had suspected for years, as an…
Husbands: 17 Things They Are Good For
Marriage is an endless bouquet of blessings and discoveries, with each new day bringing new joys and delights to…
Democrats’ Poll Numbers Surging Among Key Narcoterrorist Demographic
U.S. — Following a difficult year that saw the party lose the White House to Donald Trump and both…
Ilhan Omar Argues She Should Be Able To Stay In Horrible Country She Hates
MINNEAPOLIS, MN — Congresswoman Ilhan Omar has gone on the record to condemn Trump for suggesting she be deported…
Tim Walz Offers Journalists Free Tampons To Stop Talking About Fraud Scandal
ST. PAUL, MN — Desperate to clear his good name, Minnesota Governor Tim Walz offered to give several journalists…
Man Longs For Good Old Days When Black Friday Shopping Was Done In Person And Everyone Feared For Their Lives
BEAUMONT, TX — Local man Michael Strong looked wistfully out the window, longing for the good old days when…