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Category: Babylon Bee

Man Leading Bible Study Taken Up Into Heaven After Dropping Greek Word
Babylon Bee

Man Leading Bible Study Taken Up Into Heaven After Dropping Greek Word

FinnMarch 13, 2025

BLUE SPRINGS, MO — Members of a church small group were witness to a miraculous event this week, as a…

Man Rents Steamroller To Squeeze One Last Usable Amount Of Toothpaste From Tube
Babylon Bee

Man Rents Steamroller To Squeeze One Last Usable Amount Of Toothpaste From Tube

FinnMarch 13, 2025

SEWARD, NE — A local man set an impressive new standard for frugality this week by renting a professional-grade steamroller…

Checkmate: Trump Hits Canada With Tariff Of Double Infinity Plus One
Babylon Bee

Checkmate: Trump Hits Canada With Tariff Of Double Infinity Plus One

FinnMarch 12, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Canada is reeling after Trump upped the ante in the trade war by slapping America’s northern neighbor…

Life Hack: Volunteer For Parking Lot Ministry And You’ll Never Have To Hear Another Sermon For The Rest Of Your Days
Babylon Bee

Life Hack: Volunteer For Parking Lot Ministry And You’ll Never Have To Hear Another Sermon For The Rest Of Your Days

FinnMarch 12, 2025

Check out this sweet life hack, my church brethren! Or… should I say “faith hack?” Yes, it’s true. If you…

NBA To Allow LeBron James To Play In Giant Hamster Ball So Other Players Can’t Touch Him
Babylon Bee

NBA To Allow LeBron James To Play In Giant Hamster Ball So Other Players Can’t Touch Him

FinnMarch 12, 2025

LOS ANGELES, CA — In an unprecedented move intended to protect one of the league’s most valuable commodities, the NBA…

Liberals Defeat Nazis By Painting Swastikas Everywhere And Torching Immigrant Businesses
Babylon Bee

Liberals Defeat Nazis By Painting Swastikas Everywhere And Torching Immigrant Businesses

FinnMarch 12, 2025

WORLD — Liberals across the world have defeated Naziism by painting swastikas on everything and setting fire to immigrant-owned storefronts.…

Man Longs For Simpler Time When Games Were 2D And You Could Never Get Past The First Level
Babylon Bee

Man Longs For Simpler Time When Games Were 2D And You Could Never Get Past The First Level

FinnMarch 11, 2025

RANCHO CUCAMONGA, CA — Local middle-aged man Dustin Sidewood was seen gazing out a window thoughtfully, longing for a time…

FDA Recommends 6-11 Servings Of Microplastics Every Day For Growing Children
Babylon Bee

FDA Recommends 6-11 Servings Of Microplastics Every Day For Growing Children

FinnMarch 11, 2025

SILVER SPRING, MD — In an attempt to comply with new policies being implemented by Health and Human Services Secretary…

16 Investments Doing Better Than The Current Stock Market
Babylon Bee

16 Investments Doing Better Than The Current Stock Market

FinnMarch 11, 2025

With the stock market taking it on the chin these days, Americans are wondering if there are other places they…

ISIS Claims Responsibility For Meghan Markle Netflix Show
Babylon Bee

ISIS Claims Responsibility For Meghan Markle Netflix Show

FinnMarch 11, 2025

BAGHDAD – The mystery of who unleashed a dangerous threat upon the world came one step closer to being solved,…

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