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Category: Babylon Bee

Greenland Furiously Making Snowballs In Preparation For American Military Invasion
Babylon Bee

Greenland Furiously Making Snowballs In Preparation For American Military Invasion

FinnMarch 28, 2025

NUUK — Vice President JD Vance was met with a cold reception early Friday when he arrived in Greenland to…

Manufacturer Recalls Faulty Shopping Carts With 4 Functioning Wheels
Babylon Bee

Manufacturer Recalls Faulty Shopping Carts With 4 Functioning Wheels

FinnMarch 28, 2025

U.S. — Kart Rite Manufacturing (KRM) issued a nationwide recall this week following the discovery of a grocery store shopping…

Hollywood Calls It Quits After Realizing It Will Never Top ‘Smokey And The Bandit’
Babylon Bee

Hollywood Calls It Quits After Realizing It Will Never Top ‘Smokey And The Bandit’

FinnMarch 28, 2025

HOLLYWOOD, CA — Movie production has officially ceased, ending the dreams of aspiring actors and screenwriters everywhere, as all Hollywood…

‘We Got Her’: British Police Arrest Dangerous 80 Year Old Who Spread Butter Using A Knife
Babylon Bee

‘We Got Her’: British Police Arrest Dangerous 80 Year Old Who Spread Butter Using A Knife

FinnMarch 28, 2025

LONDON — British authorities took one of the U.K.’s most dangerous individuals off the streets, with police announcing the arrest…

9 Dangerous Weapons Being Confiscated By British Police
Babylon Bee

9 Dangerous Weapons Being Confiscated By British Police

FinnMarch 27, 2025

The British Constable is on the prowl, and he is rounding up dangerous weapons by the minute to keep England…

Political Neutrality Of PBS Questioned After New Footage Of Elmo Keying Cybertruck
Babylon Bee

Political Neutrality Of PBS Questioned After New Footage Of Elmo Keying Cybertruck

FinnMarch 27, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Hearings on Capitol Hill took a dramatic turn today, with PBS’s bipartisanship being questioned due to newly…

‘Snow White’ Early Favorite To Dominate Oscars
Babylon Bee

‘Snow White’ Early Favorite To Dominate Oscars

FinnMarch 27, 2025

HOLLYWOOD, CA — Disney’s latest offering, Snow White, is already garnering Oscar buzz after performing terribly at the box office…

TV Show Wraps Up After A Good Run With A Satisfying Finale Leaving No Loose Ends [Satire]
Babylon Bee

TV Show Wraps Up After A Good Run With A Satisfying Finale Leaving No Loose Ends [Satire]

FinnMarch 27, 2025

U.S. — Defying all odds, a popular television show has wrapped up with a satisfying finale that leaves no loose…

British Prime Minister Announces Prosecution Of King Arthur For Pulling Dangerous Sword From Stone
Babylon Bee

British Prime Minister Announces Prosecution Of King Arthur For Pulling Dangerous Sword From Stone

FinnMarch 27, 2025

LONDON — British PM Keir Starmer has announced that he has directed authorities to prosecute the famous King Arthur for…

7 Ways You Too Can Achieve Trump’s Perfect Orange Skin Glow
Babylon Bee

7 Ways You Too Can Achieve Trump’s Perfect Orange Skin Glow

FinnMarch 26, 2025

As the leader of the free world, President Donald J. Trump is a role model for all Americans. From his…

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