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Category: Babylon Bee

Can Trump Serve a Third Term? Here Are 11 Ways It Could Happen
Babylon Bee

Can Trump Serve a Third Term? Here Are 11 Ways It Could Happen

FinnMarch 31, 2025

Democracy is dead because Trump killed it by being elected to a second presidential term. But could he kill it…

Finally, They’re Playing An Old Hymn In Church – Wait, False Alarm, They’ve Added A Weird New Chorus
Babylon Bee

Finally, They’re Playing An Old Hymn In Church – Wait, False Alarm, They’ve Added A Weird New Chorus

FinnMarch 31, 2025

U.S. — It’s a welcome act of God’s gracious providence: all the indications show that they’re finally playing a good…

You’ll Never Guess What’s Under The Pyramids! (It’s Sand)
Babylon Bee

You’ll Never Guess What’s Under The Pyramids! (It’s Sand)

FinnMarch 31, 2025

GIZA — Researchers have made a startling discovery about what lies beneath the Great Pyramids: it’s sand.   Read MoreBabylon Bee…

Yankees Debut New Gloves
Babylon Bee

Yankees Debut New Gloves

FinnMarch 31, 2025

NEW YORK, NY — Continuing to find every equipment modification that could give them a competitive edge, the New York…

Trump Doesn’t Rule Out Possibility Of Becoming Immortal Emperor Of Mankind For Next 10,000 Years
Babylon Bee

Trump Doesn’t Rule Out Possibility Of Becoming Immortal Emperor Of Mankind For Next 10,000 Years

FinnMarch 31, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Trump assuaged fears that he would seek an unconstitutional third term as President by suggesting he…

Here’s A Pickup Line To Use On A Girl Of Each Christian Denomination
Babylon Bee

Here’s A Pickup Line To Use On A Girl Of Each Christian Denomination

FinnMarch 31, 2025

If you’re a Christian guy looking to find a godly wife, you know it can be hard to start a…

JD Vance Sweetens Deal By Offering Statue Of Liberty To Greenland
Babylon Bee

JD Vance Sweetens Deal By Offering Statue Of Liberty To Greenland

FinnMarch 30, 2025

GREENLAND — In a bid to sweeten the offer of becoming an American territory, Vice President JD Vance has offered…

Kid Outed As Homeschooler After Looking Adult In The Eyes While Talking
Babylon Bee

Kid Outed As Homeschooler After Looking Adult In The Eyes While Talking

FinnMarch 30, 2025

PLANO, TX — Local seven-year-old Benjamin Gunther was outed as a homeschooler after he looked an adult directly in the…

Lego Introduces ‘California Home’ Set Where Kids Fill Out Permit And Wait 2 Years For Approval
Babylon Bee

Lego Introduces ‘California Home’ Set Where Kids Fill Out Permit And Wait 2 Years For Approval

FinnMarch 29, 2025

LEGOLAND, CA — Representatives from LEGO gathered at Legoland in San Diego to unveil a new series of building sets…

Man Holds Off On Reading Bible So As Not To Ruin Suspense Of ‘Passion Of The Christ’ Sequel
Babylon Bee

Man Holds Off On Reading Bible So As Not To Ruin Suspense Of ‘Passion Of The Christ’ Sequel

FinnMarch 29, 2025

RUIDOSO, NM — Local man Pete Blanton has decided to refrain from reading the Bible so as not to dampen…

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