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Category: Babylon Bee

Locals In Galilee Rejoice As Jesus Turns Seed Oil Into Beef Tallow
Babylon Bee

Locals In Galilee Rejoice As Jesus Turns Seed Oil Into Beef Tallow

FinnMarch 10, 2025

CANA — Large crowds gathered at a local burger joint following news that a man purported to be the Messiah…

Tucker Interviews Saruman To Talk About Rohan’s Warmongering
Babylon Bee

Tucker Interviews Saruman To Talk About Rohan’s Warmongering

FinnMarch 10, 2025

ISENGARD — In his latest effort to challenge mainstream narratives by sitting down with controversial world leaders, Tucker Carlson traveled…

Man Who Thought He Grew Up Poor Suddenly Realizes His Dad Was Just A Cheapskate
Babylon Bee

Man Who Thought He Grew Up Poor Suddenly Realizes His Dad Was Just A Cheapskate

FinnMarch 10, 2025

NICEVILLE, FL — A local man was confronted with an uncomfortable reality today, as after spending his entire life thinking…

Disgruntled Churchgoers Hold Up Protest Paddles
Babylon Bee

Disgruntled Churchgoers Hold Up Protest Paddles

FinnMarch 9, 2025

BLOOMINGTON, IN — The disaffected congregation of First Baptist Bloomingdale has decided to register their complaints silently by holding up…

Uh-Oh: WNBA Players Demand To Be Paid What They’re Worth And Now They Owe The NBA $400 Million
Babylon Bee

Uh-Oh: WNBA Players Demand To Be Paid What They’re Worth And Now They Owe The NBA $400 Million

FinnMarch 9, 2025

U.S. — Collective bargaining agreements for the WNBA took an unexpected turn as players demanded to be paid what they…

‘Ladies And Gentlemen, We Got Him’: RFK Jr. Announces Seal Team Six Has Neutralized The Kool-Aid Man
Babylon Bee

‘Ladies And Gentlemen, We Got Him’: RFK Jr. Announces Seal Team Six Has Neutralized The Kool-Aid Man

FinnMarch 9, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. announced that Seal Tim Six conducted a daring overnight raid and…

This International Women’s Day, The Babylon Bee Honors Eve’s Historic Choice To Plunge The World Into Sin
Babylon Bee

This International Women’s Day, The Babylon Bee Honors Eve’s Historic Choice To Plunge The World Into Sin

FinnMarch 8, 2025

Happy International Women’s Day! Women have done many great things throughout the course of history. That’s why a day has…

Did You Know? You Can Watch The Entire LOTR Extended Edition While Waiting For Bathroom Air Dryer To Dry Your Hands
Babylon Bee

Did You Know? You Can Watch The Entire LOTR Extended Edition While Waiting For Bathroom Air Dryer To Dry Your Hands

FinnMarch 8, 2025

Helpful hint!   Read MoreBabylon Bee FinnFinn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as…

How Was I Supposed To Know ‘Business Casual’ Didn’t Include An Authentic 101st Airborne Paratrooper’s Uniform?
Babylon Bee

How Was I Supposed To Know ‘Business Casual’ Didn’t Include An Authentic 101st Airborne Paratrooper’s Uniform?

FinnMarch 8, 2025

Is anyone else sick of all these confusing “dress code” terms that get thrown at us at seemingly every networking…

Modern-Day Rosa Parks Refuses To Leave Tip For Takeout Order
Babylon Bee

Modern-Day Rosa Parks Refuses To Leave Tip For Takeout Order

FinnMarch 7, 2025

MONTGOMERY, AL — Authorities responded to a call at an International House of Pancakes off Atlanta Highway where witnesses said…

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