Too Far? Biden Pardons All Bicyclists
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The Biden administration faced its fiercest wave of criticism yet with even the president’s most ardent supporters…
Category: Babylon Bee
Clarence Thomas Wows Audiences With Starring Role In ‘Annie’
MANHATTAN, NY — Broadway audiences were in for a real treat when Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas took the stage…
Biden Calls For New Gun Laws He Can Pardon His Son For Breaking
WASHINGTON, D.C. — After yet another tragic shooting, President Biden has just called for new gun control laws that he…
12 Most Common Questions Wives Ask During Movies
Women are a mystery. We literally do not understand them at all. So, we consulted with the top women researchers,…
Historians In Year 3400 Still Struggling To Figure Out Why Beyonce Was Famous
3400 AD — According to reports, researchers in the year 3400 are still struggling to discover why an artist and…
Drone Problem Solved After They Try Flying Over Texas
TEXAS — The recent issue of unidentified drones hovering over American skies was solved suddenly today after the drones attempted…
Biden Issues Pardon To The Dark Lord Sauron
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a surprise move this morning, President Biden announced he has granted a full and complete pardon…
‘That’s Really Interesting, Thanks For The Great Idea I’d Never Thought Of Before,’ Says New Mom To Person Telling Her To Sleep When The Baby Sleeps
ARVADA, CO — Local mom of three Kylee Miller was incredibly grateful to receive the advice to “sleep when the…
On This Day In History: St. Nicholas Punches Arius For Claiming ‘Die Hard’ Is Not A Christmas Movie
WORLD — On this very day nearly 17 centuries ago, St. Nicholas made history by punching the heretic Arius for…
Nancy Pelosi Hospitalized With Dangerously Low Blood Alcohol Level
LUXEMBOURG — According to eyewitnesses at the Grand Duke’s palace, Nancy Pelosi was rushed to the hospital earlier today after…