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Category: Babylon Bee

Babylon Bee

Iran Update: Current Tax Dollars Winning Battle Against Tax Dollars From Three Years Ago

FinnMarch 18, 2026

    TEHRAN — After three weeks of fighting in Iran, current U.S. tax dollars are steadily defeating U.S. tax dollars…

Babylon Bee

Mom Frustrated As Kids Once Again Devour Groceries Before Getting Home From Store

FinnMarch 17, 2026

    LINCOLN, NE — Local mom Clara Gibbons expressed dismay upon discovering that her children had once again eaten all…

Babylon Bee

Spirit Unveils New All-Duct Tape Aircraft

FinnMarch 17, 2026

    DANIA BEACH, FL — Spirit Airlines unveiled a new all-duct tape aircraft that is expected to increase the company’s…

Babylon Bee

Man Condemned To Hell For Texting ‘LOL’ When He Didn’t Really Laugh Out Loud

FinnMarch 17, 2026

    HADES — Demons happily welcomed 27-year-old Jim Carole to Hell on Tuesday after he was immediately condemned to eternal…

Babylon Bee

John Thune Vows To Bring SAVE Act Up For Vote As Soon As He’s Sure It Won’t Pass

FinnMarch 17, 2026

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — With Americans pressing their senators and representatives to take action to secure elections, Senate Majority Leader…

Babylon Bee

9 Clear Signs The Ayatollah Is Gay

FinnMarch 16, 2026

    In addition to reports that he was seriously injured in airstrikes at the onset of the U.S.-Iran conflict, new…

Babylon Bee

‘Jim Crow 2.0!’ Shouts Chuck Schumer While Being Escorted Out Of Costco For Not Having Membership Card

FinnMarch 16, 2026

    ALEXANDRIA, VA — Senator Chuck Schumer was seen struggling with Costco security guards after failing to show his membership…

Babylon Bee

Ayatollah Disappointed To Learn 72 Virgins Awaiting Him In Paradise Are All Women

FinnMarch 16, 2026

    TEHRAN — With rumors about his sexual preferences circulating amid the ongoing military conflict ravaging his country, the new…

Babylon Bee

‘Sinners’ Wins Oscar For Crappiest Movie To Win Oscar

FinnMarch 15, 2026

    HOLLYWOOD, CA — The horror movie Sinners has officially won the Oscar for “Crappiest Movie To Win An Oscar”.…

Babylon Bee

Trump Snubbed Again At Oscars For Role In ‘Home Alone 2’

FinnMarch 15, 2026

    HOLLYWOOD, CA — President Trump has once again been snubbed for his iconic role in Home Alone 2: Lost…

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