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Category: Babylon Bee

Babylon Bee

Ayatollah To Give Speech As Soon As Officials Find The Rest Of His Body

FinnFebruary 28, 2026

    TEHRAN — Iranian officials have promised that Ayatollah Khamenei will give a speech just as soon as they have…

Babylon Bee

Tucker Carlson Sneaks Into U.S. Military Hangar To Slash The Tires On All The B-2 Bombers

FinnFebruary 27, 2026

    U.S. — The Pentagon released a statement on Friday confirming a security breach by political commentator Tucker Carlson, who…

Babylon Bee

10 Amazing Perks Of Becoming A Catholic

FinnFebruary 27, 2026

    There may be a bias toward Protestantism here, but being Catholic has its perks, too (reportedly). A delegation from…

Babylon Bee

Bill Clinton Tells Epstein Committee It Depends On What The Definition Of ‘Child Trafficking’ Is

FinnFebruary 27, 2026

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — Former president and axophone player Bill Clinton testified to members of Congress today that his answer…

Babylon Bee

Tesla Unveils Self-Driving Little Tikes Cozy Coupe

FinnFebruary 27, 2026

    U.S. — Tesla announced on Friday that it had entered an agreement to create a joint venture with Little…

Babylon Bee

Genius Dad Joins TikTok, Causing Teenage Daughter To Think It’s Lame

FinnFebruary 26, 2026

    ST. GEORGE, UT — Local dad Sam Weaver struck a fatal blow against his teenage daughter’s obsession with TikTok…

Babylon Bee

Cruel: Trump Admin Strips Funding From Gas-Station Daycare Center With 20,000 Students

FinnFebruary 26, 2026

    SHOREVIEW, MN — In the latest in a long line of cruel, heartless atrocities it has committed, the Trump…

Babylon Bee

Iran Says They Will Rain Death And Destruction On The U.S. If They Are Bombed Two More Times

FinnFebruary 26, 2026

    GENEVA — Amid ongoing negotiations over Tehran’s nuclear program, Iran’s Supreme Leader unequivocally informed the United States that they…

Babylon Bee

Bold Right-Wing Truth-Teller Very Carefully Chooses Words So As Not To Speak Truths That Would Anger Own Audience

FinnFebruary 26, 2026

    U.S. — Shockwaves were felt among the conservative influencer sphere this week, as one bold, right-wing truth-teller very carefully…

Babylon Bee

Politician On Epstein List Grilled By Other Politicians On Epstein List

FinnFebruary 26, 2026

    CHAPPAQUA, NY — A lifelong politician whose name appeared on the Epstein list was questioned today by other politicians…

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