Brie Larson’s Career Taking Off After Shutting Up
HOLLYWOOD, CA — The movie industry saw the revival of one of its brightest young stars, as actress Brie…
Category: Babylon Bee
ZipRecruiter Ad Interrupted By Brief Word From Podcast
LOS ANGELES, CA — Local woman Vanessa Miller reported feeling annoyed Thursday morning when her favorite weekly ZipRecruiter ad…
Trump Presidential Library To Feature Solemn ‘Reflecting Pool’ Of Liberal Tears
MIAMI, FL — As depicted in an exciting presentation of computer renderings of its breathtaking design, the proposed Donald…
Scientists Invent Revolutionary Kids’ Bike That Uses Pedals Instead Of Electric Power
CAMBRIDGE, MA — Engineers at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology reportedly developed an innovative new children’s bike that uses…
‘Good News, You’re Finally Useful,’ Says Trump As He Sends Aquaman To Strait Of Hormuz
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump announced a plan on Monday to open up the Strait of Hormuz later…
MLB Umpires Admit They’ve Kinda Just Been Guessing This Whole Time
U.S. — As baseball’s opening weekend ended with the sports world buzzing about the new Automated Ball-Strike System changing…
Cruel, Heartless Wife Goes On Fun Girls’ Weekend Leaving Poor Husband All Alone And Lonely And Helpless
TOLEDO, OH — Local wife Aubrey Jackson reportedly left the house for 72 hours on a girls’ weekend, cruelly…
Pope Leo: ‘God Does Not Listen To People Who Wage War, So Long As You Don’t Count Moses, David, Joshua, Elijah, Saul, Gideon, Samson, Or Anyone Else In Bible’
VATICAN CITY — Pope Leo boldly proclaimed today that God does not listen to the prayers of those who…
Dozens Of Injuries Reported At ‘No Kings’ Rally After Multi-Scooter Pileup
BOSTON, MA — Dozens of significant injuries have been reported at the “No Kings” rally today after a multi-scooter…
Trump Deploys 10,000 Soldiers To Spread Word There Is No War In Iran
U.S. — President Trump has announced the deployment of 10,000 soldiers to help spread the word that there is…