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Category: Babylon Bee

Babylon Bee

Patriots Draft Marriage Counselor In Second Round

FinnApril 24, 2026

    PITTSBURGH, PA — With their second-round pick in the 2026 NFL Draft, the New England Patriots have officially selected…

Babylon Bee

Nation On Edge After Soldier Places $50K Polymarket Bet That Trump Will Nuke Iran

FinnApril 24, 2026

    U.S. — The United States is reportedly on edge following a leaked report that indicated an American soldier placed…

Babylon Bee

Evangelical Church Architect Fired For Suggesting Steeple

FinnApril 23, 2026

    OKLAHOMA CITY, OK — A local architect contracted to design the new location for First Testimony Crosspointe Church was…

Babylon Bee

10 Amazing Organizations Funded By The SPLC

FinnApril 23, 2026

    For decades, the folks at the Southern Poverty Law Center have done far more than just advocacy. The group…

Babylon Bee

Gavin Newsom Admits He Really Doesn’t Want To Be President, He Just Wants To Leave California

FinnApril 23, 2026

    SACRAMENTO, CA — Governor Gavin Newsom finally admitted today that he has no real desire to become President of…

Babylon Bee

Democrats: Saving Democracy Requires One Party To Seize Total Power And Rule Forever

FinnApril 23, 2026

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — Washington Democrats defended their unquenchable thirst for unlimited power on Thursday, confirming that saving democracy requires…

Babylon Bee

Nation Excitedly Gathers For Annual Tradition Of Seeing Whose Career Will Be Killed By Cleveland Browns

FinnApril 23, 2026

    U.S. — In what has become one of America’s most cherished annual traditions, a giddy nation will gather around…

Babylon Bee

NFL To Utilize Hogwarts’ Sorting Hat For This Year’s Draft

FinnApril 22, 2026

    PITTSBURGH, PA — In a stark change from decades of tradition, the National Football League announced that, rather than…

Babylon Bee

10 Powerful Stories From People Who Converted To Atheism

FinnApril 22, 2026

    We all love a good conversion story. Those beautiful accounts of people who thought life had meaning and then…

Babylon Bee

Man Packs Book For Vacation So He Can Carry Around Book On Vacation

FinnApril 22, 2026

    SAN DIEGO, CA — In accordance with his normal travel routine, a local man made sure that he packed…

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Latest posts

  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald Trump chats with Trey Gowdy right now
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  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: President DJT says Kharg Island being blown to smithereens
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social August 31 2026

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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