Media To Just Start Reporting When Trump Wasn’t Shot At
U.S. — After yet another failed assassination attempt against President Trump yesterday, the national media has agreed to just…
Category: Babylon Bee
Platner Smooths Things Over With Democrats By Covering Nazi Tattoo With Hammer & Sickle
BANGOR, ME — Democratic Senate candidate Graham Platner has smoothed things over with supporters by covering up his Nazi…
Church Hack: Explain To Everyone Stacking Chairs That You’d Love To Help But Your Spiritual Gift Is Encouragement
Getting a little tired of youth pastors teaching the Parable of the Talents and then asking you to go…
Man Discovers Amazing New Weight Loss Method Of Crippling Stress And Anxiety
NEW BRITAIN, CT — Local tax preparer Frank MacArthur recently discovered an amazingly effective way to lose weight that…
‘Throw Pillows’ Narrowly Edges ‘Food’ In Local Couple’s Monthly Budget
DES MOINES, IA — After a tense end-of-month budgeting session, local couple Derek and Amanda Hollister confirmed on Friday…
10 Great New Jobs For Stephen Colbert After ‘Late Show’ Finale
Talk show host Steven Colbert signed off this week after CBS aired his final episode of The Late Show,…
Trump Surprises Don Jr. With Beautiful Wedding Gift Of Cuba
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump confirmed on Friday that, instead of attending his son’s wedding in the Bahamas,…
DNC 2024 Election Autopsy Just Joe Biden’s Actual Autopsy
U.S. — The Democratic National Committee released its autopsy this week of what went wrong in the 2024 election…
Hunter Biden’s Reputation In Ruins After Talking To Candace Owens
U.S. — After sitting down for an interview with podcaster Candace Owens, Hunter Biden’s reputation was reportedly in ruins.…
Company-Wide Meeting Really Just For Phil
GREENVILLE, SC — Sources revealed that the company-wide meeting scheduled today for all SynerTech employees was, in actuality, just…