Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Breaking

Historical Accuracy Now Includes Slavery At Founding Father’s House
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Historical Accuracy Now Includes Slavery At Founding Father’s House

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest controversy in Philadelphia, where the Trump administration has reinstalled panels about…

TV Station Owners About To Get Absurdly Larger Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

TV Station Owners About To Get Absurdly Larger Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2026

The Federal Communications Commission (FCC) is at it again, and I’m sipping my coffee, thinking, “what’s next?” They’re changing the…

Obama Lawyer Regrets Epstein Connection Bigly
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Obama Lawyer Regrets Epstein Connection Bigly

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Kathy Ruemmler, the former Obama White House counsel who’s in hot water…

I Pretend to be a Boxer for 2 Hours and Call it a Biopic Somehow Stallone Approved This Mess
Breaking, Movie News

I Pretend to be a Boxer for 2 Hours and Call it a Biopic Somehow Stallone Approved This Mess

FinnJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

The most epic story of all time is coming to a theater near you, and by epic, I mean it’s…

Because What The World Really Needed Was More Time To Forget The First One
Breaking, Movie News

Because What The World Really Needed Was More Time To Forget The First One

FinnJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

The Batman Part II has been pushed back yet again, because of course it has. The latest delay puts the…

Teens Charged With Tampering After Swim Team Member Drowns
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Teens Charged With Tampering After Swim Team Member Drowns

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the mysterious death of Daniel Erving, an 18-year-old athlete who drowned in a…

Capcom slashes Monster Hunter prices to lure back fleeing fans
Breaking, Games News

Capcom slashes Monster Hunter prices to lure back fleeing fans

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

In a bizarre turn of events, CAPCOM has decided to buck the trend of nickel-and-diming gamers to death, announcing a…

Death Angel to somehow still exist in 2026 and tour Europe because you clearly needed this
Breaking, Music News

Death Angel to somehow still exist in 2026 and tour Europe because you clearly needed this

Chord F. DiscordJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

Oh great, because what the world really needed was another tour announcement from a band that’s been around longer than…

Inflation Gets Slightly Less Awful For Now Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Inflation Gets Slightly Less Awful For Now Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest inflation numbers, and I’ve got to say, it’s a mixed…

Maine Democrats Frantically Compete To Fill Totally Not Toxic Seat
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Maine Democrats Frantically Compete To Fill Totally Not Toxic Seat

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Democratic primary in Maine is turning out to be a…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 153 154 155 … 605 Next

Latest posts

  • The Babylon Bee Interviews The Lindsay Clancy Jury
  • AI Employee Bails Again Due to Safety Concerns
  • Lombardo still has a drum kit apparently
  • FORBIDDEN still exists somehow and has new music
  • Mike D Rocks Fallon with Beastie Boys Hits

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.