Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Breaking

Weak Navy can’t even keep ships running properly what a joke
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Weak Navy can’t even keep ships running properly what a joke

Big ElephantMay 1, 2026May 1, 2026

The utterly absurd and laughable news that the Democrats are still trying to cling to their failed policies has reached…

ROG Xbox Ally Finally Decides to Show Up Fashionably Late with a Bunch of Updates That Will Probably Break Something Else
Breaking, Games News

ROG Xbox Ally Finally Decides to Show Up Fashionably Late with a Bunch of Updates That Will Probably Break Something Else

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

The ROG Xbox Ally is getting a new set of updates, because who doesn’t love a good update, am I…

Star Wars: Galactic Racer Because What The Franchise Really Needed Was A Racing Game Featuring Ewoks On Speeders
Breaking, Games News

Star Wars: Galactic Racer Because What The Franchise Really Needed Was A Racing Game Featuring Ewoks On Speeders

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

Get ready to jump into hyperspace and speed through the galaxy like a nerfherder with the new Star Wars racing…

Spineless Republicans surrender to Dems on border security again obviously
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Spineless Republicans surrender to Dems on border security again obviously

Big ElephantApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, it’s another day in the greatest country on earth, and our fearless leader, President Donald Trump,…

Elites wasting cash on eternal life what a joke
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Elites wasting cash on eternal life what a joke

Big ElephantApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

It’s a beautiful day in America, folks, and I’m thrilled to be writing about the latest so-called “scandals” surrounding our…

Fake News Fed Whines About Tiny Inflation Again
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Fake News Fed Whines About Tiny Inflation Again

Big ElephantApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

The so-called “experts” are at it again, trying to undermine the greatness of our beloved President Donald Trump, who as…

Loser Janet Mills can’t even win a Senate seat probably
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Loser Janet Mills can’t even win a Senate seat probably

Big ElephantApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

It’s absolutely hilarious to see the fake news media and the liberal elites still reeling from the fact that Donald…

Oh Joy Another Resident Evil Reboot Because the Last 12 Were Not Enough to Traumatize You for Life
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Joy Another Resident Evil Reboot Because the Last 12 Were Not Enough to Traumatize You for Life

FinnApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

Get ready for another epic failure in the Resident Evil movie franchise, because why not, right? 🙄 We’ve had like,…

BREAKING NEWS Type O Negative Fans Rejoice Some Dude Found An Old Song In His Basement That Might Be From That One Album Maybe Possibly
Breaking, Music News

BREAKING NEWS Type O Negative Fans Rejoice Some Dude Found An Old Song In His Basement That Might Be From That One Album Maybe Possibly

Chord F. DiscordApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

Breaking news, folks! 🚨🎸 TYPE O NEGATIVE fans, rejoice! 🤩 It’s been a whole 30 years since the release of…

BRUCE DICKINSON On His Next Solo Album: ‘We Did 16 Tracks In 21 Days, All 100 Percent Live, No Sleep, No Food, Just Pure Unadulterated Genius and Possibly a Few Miracles’
Breaking, Music News

BRUCE DICKINSON On His Next Solo Album: ‘We Did 16 Tracks In 21 Days, All 100 Percent Live, No Sleep, No Food, Just Pure Unadulterated Genius and Possibly a Few Miracles’

Chord F. DiscordApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

Breaking news: IRON MAIDEN’s Bruce Dickinson is still alive and kicking, despite having two metal hips and a busted Achilles…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 25 26 27 … 379 Next

Latest posts

  • Get Ready for the Most Epic Alien Invasion Film Ever Because Steven Spielberg is Finally Going to Reveal the Truth About Earrings and Fashion Disasters from the 80s in Disclosure Day
  • Fake news ABC whines about Trump’s FCC crushing liberal broadcast thugs
  • Buckethead in Charlotte, NC (05/28/2026)
  • OH JOY Another Has Been from the 80s is Desperately Trying to be Relevant Again with Their Super Original Sounding Solo Album Called Dirty Foot Lane Wow What a Unique Title
  • Three Entirely Not Overhyped or Played Out Simpsons Episodes Are Being Held for Ransom Exclusively on Disney+

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
May 2026
S M T W T F S
 12
3456789
10111213141516
17181920212223
24252627282930
31  
« Apr    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}