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Category: Breaking

OMG SLAYER Fans Are Totally Not Going to Lose Their Minds Over This Insanely Overhyped 40th Anniversary Reissue of Hell Awaits That You Definitely Need to Buy Again
Breaking, Music News

OMG SLAYER Fans Are Totally Not Going to Lose Their Minds Over This Insanely Overhyped 40th Anniversary Reissue of Hell Awaits That You Definitely Need to Buy Again

Chord F. DiscordApril 16, 2026April 16, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic news? 🤣 SLAYER’s iconic second studio album, “Hell Awaits”, is getting…

Liberal media freaks out over nothing again obviously
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal media freaks out over nothing again obviously

Big ElephantApril 16, 2026April 16, 2026

It’s 2026, and our great nation is still reeling from the devastating consequences of having the best, the greatest, the…

Traitor Pence aide joins Democrat losers and anti-Trump America haters
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Traitor Pence aide joins Democrat losers and anti-Trump America haters

Big ElephantApril 16, 2026April 16, 2026

It’s laughable to think that anyone would question the sheer brilliance of our great President Donald Trump, who has been…

Because You Clearly Didn’t Have Enough Games to Play Already GeForce NOW Is Blessing You with PRAGMATA and Three Other Things to Waste Your Life On This Week
Breaking, Games News

Because You Clearly Didn’t Have Enough Games to Play Already GeForce NOW Is Blessing You with PRAGMATA and Three Other Things to Waste Your Life On This Week

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 16, 2026April 16, 2026

NVIDIA just went full rocket scientist and sent GeForce NOW to the moon 🚀, bringing not one, not two, but…

The New Street Fighter Trailer Is So Lit It Just Spontaneously Combusted Into a Giant Fireball of Awesomeness
Breaking, Movie News

The New Street Fighter Trailer Is So Lit It Just Spontaneously Combusted Into a Giant Fireball of Awesomeness

FinnApril 16, 2026April 16, 2026

The new Street Fighter movie is coming, and it’s a total blast from the past… or a desperate attempt to…

Spaceballs 2 Because You Clearly Didn’t Learn Your Lesson the First Time
Breaking, Movie News

Spaceballs 2 Because You Clearly Didn’t Learn Your Lesson the First Time

FinnApril 16, 2026April 16, 2026

The prophecy has been fulfilled, and Mel Brooks, the almighty space wizard, has finally made Spaceballs 2 at the ripe…

Why Earn It When You Can Crowdfund It? The New Meta for Metal Festival Survival 💀
Death, Taxes, and Death Metal: Andrey Pershin is Crowdfunding Rent While He’s in the Mosh Pit 🤘
Breaking, Music News

Why Earn It When You Can Crowdfund It? The New Meta for Metal Festival Survival 💀

FinnApril 15, 2026April 15, 2026

While you’re rotting away in your cubicle, dreaming of a cold beer and a single weekend without a Slack notification…

Madonna Emerges from Cryogenic Freezer to Bless Us with Another Album Because We Obviously Haven’t Suffered Enough with Confessions II
Breaking, Music News

Madonna Emerges from Cryogenic Freezer to Bless Us with Another Album Because We Obviously Haven’t Suffered Enough with Confessions II

Chord F. DiscordApril 15, 2026April 15, 2026

Breaking news, folks, the Queen of Pop, Madonna, has finally decided to bless us with a new album, Confessions ll,…

Marvel Just Lost Almost Its Entire Visual Development Team Because Who Needs Good Art Anyway
Breaking, Movie News

Marvel Just Lost Almost Its Entire Visual Development Team Because Who Needs Good Art Anyway

FinnApril 15, 2026April 15, 2026

A month into new Disney CEO Josh D’Amaro’s tenure, and he’s already making magic happen – by making around 1,000…

Liberals eating own, good riddance to creepy Swalwell
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberals eating own, good riddance to creepy Swalwell

Big ElephantApril 15, 2026April 15, 2026

The so-called “journalists” are at it again, trying to tear down our great nation and our fearless leader, President Donald…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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