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Category: Breaking

Chris Barnes Claims New SIX FEET UNDER Album Will Be Good (Press X to Doubt)
Breaking, Music News

Chris Barnes Claims New SIX FEET UNDER Album Will Be Good (Press X to Doubt)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 16, 2025July 16, 2025

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! Chris Barnes, the vocal… well, he vocalizes for those death metal dinosaurs SIX FEET…

The Orb, bless their cotton socks, unleash ‘Buddhist Hipsters’ album right before their UK tour – prepare for enlightenment (or at least a good nap)
Breaking, Music News

The Orb, bless their cotton socks, unleash ‘Buddhist Hipsters’ album right before their UK tour – prepare for enlightenment (or at least a good nap)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 16, 2025July 16, 2025

OMG , the legends of ambient house, The Orb, are back with a new album called Buddhist Hipsters! Will it…

Genshin Impact’s Ban-Hammer: Age Up or GTFO on July 18th
Breaking, Games News

Genshin Impact’s Ban-Hammer: Age Up or GTFO on July 18th

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 16, 2025July 16, 2025

So, apparently, Genshin Impact is now playing nanny and demanding everyone prove they’re not a bunch of toddlers before they…

Cyberpunk 2077 2pointOMG Update: Now Your Car Can Also Glitch Through Walls
Breaking, Games News

Cyberpunk 2077 2pointOMG Update: Now Your Car Can Also Glitch Through Walls

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 16, 2025July 16, 2025

Well, well, well, choombas. Looks like CD Projekt RED is back at it again with the 2.3 update for Cyberpunk…

“I Know What You Did Last Summer” Review: More Like “I Know What You Did Last Summer” Snooze-fest
Breaking, Movie News

“I Know What You Did Last Summer” Review: More Like “I Know What You Did Last Summer” Snooze-fest

FinnJuly 16, 2025July 16, 2025

Okay, so like, movies 🙄. Apparently, they’re supposed to teach us stuff. Like, according to the OG I Know What…

Gaming and Streaming: Because Apparently Gamers Have No Friends IRL
Breaking, Games News

Gaming and Streaming: Because Apparently Gamers Have No Friends IRL

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 16, 2025July 16, 2025

Alright, buckle up, buttercups! 🧈 If you’ve stumbled anywhere near the internet in the last decade (and if you haven’t,…

Pantera Dusts Off Grandma’s Attic: “New” Oldies for “Heaviest Tour (Maybe)” Kickoff in Burgettstown, PA
Breaking, Music News

Pantera Dusts Off Grandma’s Attic: “New” Oldies for “Heaviest Tour (Maybe)” Kickoff in Burgettstown, PA

Chord F. DiscordJuly 16, 2025July 16, 2025

PANTERA (or should we say “Pantera”?) 🙄 kicked off “The Heaviest Tour Of The Summer” Tuesday night (July 15) at…

‘The Legend of Zelda’ Casts Actors Who Will Probably Ruin Your Childhood
Breaking, Movie News

‘The Legend of Zelda’ Casts Actors Who Will Probably Ruin Your Childhood

FinnJuly 16, 2025July 16, 2025

  OMG!😱 The live-action Legend of Zelda is officially happening! But like, is it REALLY a step closer to reality,…

Wes Scantlin of Puddle of Mudd: “I’m, Like, Super Innocent, Okay?”
Breaking, Music News

Wes Scantlin of Puddle of Mudd: “I’m, Like, Super Innocent, Okay?”

Chord F. DiscordJuly 16, 2025July 16, 2025

So, apparently, our favorite trainwreck, Wes Scantlin of PUDDLE OF MUDD (or should we say Puddle *OF* Mud, because, you…

Bruce Dickinson Tries To Polish A Turd With ‘Reimagined’ ‘Cyclops’ From ‘More Balls Than Brains’ Album
Breaking, Music News

Bruce Dickinson Tries To Polish A Turd With ‘Reimagined’ ‘Cyclops’ From ‘More Balls Than Brains’ Album

Chord F. DiscordJuly 16, 2025July 16, 2025

Behold, peasants! IRON MAIDEN’s very own air raid siren, Bruce Dickinson, is gracing us with a re-release of his 1994…

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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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