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Tag: Apple

In-Game Transactions: Pro Tips to Empty Your Wallet Faster, Noob
Breaking, Games News

In-Game Transactions: Pro Tips to Empty Your Wallet Faster, Noob

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 14, 2025July 14, 2025

Ah, yes, in-game transactions. Because who doesn’t love parting with their hard-earned cash for a digital hat? 🎩 Whether you’re…

Jason Momoa, the Hawaiian Shirt Enthusiast, Becomes a Tribal Overlord in Apple TV’s Latest Bamboozle Reel
Breaking, Movie News

Jason Momoa, the Hawaiian Shirt Enthusiast, Becomes a Tribal Overlord in Apple TV’s Latest Bamboozle Reel

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

Oh, great, another Jason Momoa joint. 🙄 This time he’s not just grunting and looking pretty; he’s writing, producing, AND…

Brad Pitt’s Geriatric ‘F1’ Movie Outpaces Films Starring Actual Young People, World Weeps
Breaking, Movie News

Brad Pitt’s Geriatric ‘F1’ Movie Outpaces Films Starring Actual Young People, World Weeps

FinnJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

Oh, honey, did you hear? Joseph Kosinski’s *F1: The Movie* (or as I like to call it, *Geriatric Grand Prix*)…

Nvidia, the $4 Trillion Overlord, Laughs Maniacally at Apple and Microsoft’s Pathetic Attempts to Keep Up
Elephant Reads CNN

Nvidia, the $4 Trillion Overlord, Laughs Maniacally at Apple and Microsoft’s Pathetic Attempts to Keep Up

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2025July 10, 2025

Another day, another win for American innovation under President Trump! Nvidia, the chipmaker that’s been crushing it thanks to the…

Escape Academy 2: Back 2 School Preview: Get Ready to Question Your Life Choices With More Puzzles & Existential Dread
Breaking

Escape Academy 2: Back 2 School Preview: Get Ready to Question Your Life Choices With More Puzzles & Existential Dread

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 5, 2025July 5, 2025

Okay, so, Summer Game Fest 2025, right? We were promised “unannounced” appointments, which, let’s be honest, is like saying you’re…

5 Things You ABSOLUTELY MUST Know Today (Or the Liberal Media Will Get You)
Elephant Reads CNN

5 Things You ABSOLUTELY MUST Know Today (Or the Liberal Media Will Get You)

Big ElephantJuly 3, 2025July 3, 2025

Ah, the Fourth of July, when real Americans celebrate freedom while the libtards plot the downfall of our great nation!…

GHOST’s Tobias Forge Builds Metal Church: Prepare for ‘Skeletour’ of Utter Darkness and Questionable Architecture
Breaking, Music News

GHOST’s Tobias Forge Builds Metal Church: Prepare for ‘Skeletour’ of Utter Darkness and Questionable Architecture

Chord F. DiscordJuly 3, 2025July 3, 2025

GHOST, the *totally* underground Swedish rock band (yeah, right), is gracing the U.S. with its presence on the “Skeletour” world…

3 Times Trump’s Tariffs Magically Didn’t Fail Miserably
Elephant Reads CNN

3 Times Trump’s Tariffs Magically Didn’t Fail Miserably

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2025July 1, 2025

Fake News CNN is at it again, trying to undermine our GREAT President Trump’s brilliant strategies! They whine that his…

Booze Cruise with Explosions
Events

Booze Cruise with Explosions

Chuck B. BallsyJune 28, 2025

**Ahoy, mateys! ⛵️ Join the July 4th Boston Sailing & Firework Celebration!** Head to Winthrop for 3 hours of “unobstructed”…

Owen Wilson’s Nose Dives Back Into the ‘Meet The Parents’ Dumpster Fire
Breaking, Movie News

Owen Wilson’s Nose Dives Back Into the ‘Meet The Parents’ Dumpster Fire

FinnJune 27, 2025June 27, 2025

Oh, sweet merciful crap, they’re doing another ‘Meet the Parents’ movie? 🙄 Is nothing sacred anymore? Are we really scraping…

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Latest posts

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  • Lea Michele Shows Off Ability To Make Co-Star Cry On Command

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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