Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Beauty

Tommy Aldridge creates drum art because your walls were missing his face
Breaking, Music News

Tommy Aldridge creates drum art because your walls were missing his face

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 8, 2026September 8, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic news? 🤯 I’ve got my coffee, my favorite metal album playing…

Dlala Studios Murals Bring Brief Respite From Microtransactions At Gamescom 2026
Breaking, Games News

Dlala Studios Murals Bring Brief Respite From Microtransactions At Gamescom 2026

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 6, 2026September 6, 2026

I had the pleasure of meeting Dlala Studios CEO and Game Director, Aj Grand-Scrutton, at Summer Game Fest when I…

Wolf Hoffmann Gushes Over AI Music Because Human Creativity Is So Last Season
Breaking, Music News

Wolf Hoffmann Gushes Over AI Music Because Human Creativity Is So Last Season

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 6, 2026September 6, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, ACCEPT’s guitarist Wolf Hoffmann has spoken out about the growing threat of artificial intelligence…

Epstein’s Beauty Tips Apparently Involved Lots of Hair Dye
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Epstein’s Beauty Tips Apparently Involved Lots of Hair Dye

Big ElephantSeptember 4, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. So, it turns out that Jeffrey Epstein, the infamous convicted sex…

Nation’s Most Beautiful Land Suddenly Valuable Enough to Sell Off
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Nation’s Most Beautiful Land Suddenly Valuable Enough to Sell Off

Big ElephantAugust 29, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Trump administration is considering a plan to let a developer…

Because You Clearly Need More Content, Netflix Unveils 2026 Fall Slate
Breaking, Movie News

Because You Clearly Need More Content, Netflix Unveils 2026 Fall Slate

FinnAugust 27, 2026August 27, 2026

A new Brad Bird animated feature, a Norm Macdonald doc, two Tyler Perry movies, and the return of Cliff Booth,…

Another Soulless Apocalypse Movie To Add To The Endless Pile Of Them
Breaking, Movie News

Another Soulless Apocalypse Movie To Add To The Endless Pile Of Them

FinnAugust 26, 2026August 27, 2026

At 88 years old, Ridley Scott is still directing films with a frequency that would put many of his younger…

Because the World Needed Another RoboCop Reboot
Breaking, Movie News

Because the World Needed Another RoboCop Reboot

FinnAugust 25, 2026August 25, 2026

Dan Stevens is the new RoboCop, because of course he is. In a move that’s as surprising as a sunrise…

Netflix Still Churning Out Content Because You Clearly Need More
Breaking, Movie News

Netflix Still Churning Out Content Because You Clearly Need More

FinnAugust 19, 2026August 19, 2026

September is shaping up to be a big month for Netflix, because of course it is. The streaming giant is…

Jay Buchanan Hits Road Because You Clearly Needed More Blues Rock In Your Life
Breaking, Music News

Jay Buchanan Hits Road Because You Clearly Needed More Blues Rock In Your Life

Chord F. DiscordAugust 12, 2026August 12, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some acoustic storytelling? 🤯 I mean, who doesn’t love a good ol’ fashioned…

Posts pagination

1 2 … 8 Next

Latest posts

  • Kamala Harris’ Home Security Actually Works For Once
  • Trump Administration’s Brilliant FEMA Firings Deemed Totally Not Legal
  • Celine Dion Returns to Stage in Paris After Six Years
  • Spin of the Day: Slate Pears Game 394: Sept. 12, 2026 — 87% Journalism Not Found
  • Hegseth desperately tries to make Iran rescue sound exciting

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.