Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Cinema

The Definitive (And Only) Ranking of Sam Raimi’s Most Bonkers Creations Because Your Opinion is Wrong Forever
Breaking, Movie News

The Definitive (And Only) Ranking of Sam Raimi’s Most Bonkers Creations Because Your Opinion is Wrong Forever

FinnJanuary 26, 2026January 26, 2026

Sam Raimi directs movies with the urgency of a sloth meditating 🐢. In the past 15 years, he’s blessed us…

Sam Raimi’s Latest Gore-Splattered Mid-Life Crisis Accidentally Funnier Than Evil Dead 4 Rumors
Breaking, Movie News

Sam Raimi’s Latest Gore-Splattered Mid-Life Crisis Accidentally Funnier Than Evil Dead 4 Rumors

FinnJanuary 26, 2026January 26, 2026

Oh look, it’s another cinematic masterpiece where you can FEEL Sam Raimi sweating onto the lens like a caffeinated gargoyle…

Sophie Turner Slapped With a Pickaxe and Forced to Raid Tombs Because Netflix Can’t Leave Classic Video Games Alone
Breaking, Games News, Movie News

Sophie Turner Slapped With a Pickaxe and Forced to Raid Tombs Because Netflix Can’t Leave Classic Video Games Alone

FinnJanuary 26, 2026January 26, 2026

Behold, mortals! Amazon has finally graced us with the first official image of Sophie Turner as Lara Croft, and folks,…

Holy Wordplay, Batman! DC Just Hired a Writer to Ruin Robin
Breaking, Movie News

Holy Wordplay, Batman! DC Just Hired a Writer to Ruin Robin

FinnJanuary 26, 2026January 26, 2026

Hold onto your cowls, DC fanboys, because the Bat-Signal is flashing twice and it’s strobing like a rave in Arkham…

Primitive War 2 – Hollywood Finally Confesses They Ran Out of Humans and Are Just Recycling Dinosaurs with Fresh PTSD
Breaking, Movie News

Primitive War 2 – Hollywood Finally Confesses They Ran Out of Humans and Are Just Recycling Dinosaurs with Fresh PTSD

FinnJanuary 25, 2026January 25, 2026

Oh, great. Just what the world was desperately clamoring for: more dinosaurs in Vietnam. Because clearly, the first movie’s premise…

Jason Momoa’s Lobo Totally Crashes the New ‘Supergirl’ Trailer Like an Interplanetary Biker Dude
Breaking, Movie News

Jason Momoa’s Lobo Totally Crashes the New ‘Supergirl’ Trailer Like an Interplanetary Biker Dude

FinnJanuary 24, 2026January 24, 2026

🎉 Ladies and gentlemen, fasten your seatbelts and hide your kegs, because Jason Momoa is officially done playing the King…

Nintendo Confirms Super Mario Galaxy Movie Direct This Weekend And Oh God The Plumber Is Back In Space To Make You Cry About Luma Again
Breaking, Games News, Movie News

Nintendo Confirms Super Mario Galaxy Movie Direct This Weekend And Oh God The Plumber Is Back In Space To Make You Cry About Luma Again

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 23, 2026January 23, 2026

Brace yourselves, Star Road commuters! 🚀 Nintendo is officially panicking that you forgot about their space opera sequel and has…

The Oscars Nominations Have Officially Been Released, and the Academy Definitely Did Not Just Google “Famous Actors” This Year
Breaking, Music News

The Oscars Nominations Have Officially Been Released, and the Academy Definitely Did Not Just Google “Famous Actors” This Year

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJanuary 22, 2026January 22, 2026

🛑 BREAKING: The Oscars Gave Out Nominations Like Candy at a Diabetes Parade 🍬 Ladies, gentlemen, and confused people trying…

Netflix Execs Confused as ‘The Abandons’ Gets Abandoned After a Month
Breaking, Movie News

Netflix Execs Confused as ‘The Abandons’ Gets Abandoned After a Month

FinnJanuary 22, 2026January 22, 2026

📺 Netflix has once again proven it treats its original series like a toddler with a new toy—plays with it…

Oscars 2026 Nominations: See Which Rich People Will Pretend They Don’t Care About Winning
Breaking, Movie News

Oscars 2026 Nominations: See Which Rich People Will Pretend They Don’t Care About Winning

FinnJanuary 22, 2026January 22, 2026

Buckle up, cinephiles and professional award-watchers, because the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences just dropped its annual list…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 34 35 36 … 85 Next

Latest posts

  • Justice Department Now Dealing With Another Rich Guy’s Bad Life Choices
  • Sleep Drops New Album Hempispheres And Debut Single The Morrisist
  • Madden 27 Offers Three Day Early Access With Pre Order
  • Lollapalooza Festivalgoer Stuck in Knee Deep Mud
  • Middle East Expanded To Include Michigan

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.