Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: gamers

Nintendo Dangles Digital Carrots At Addicted Fans With New Animal Crossing Features
Breaking, Games News

Nintendo Dangles Digital Carrots At Addicted Fans With New Animal Crossing Features

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 16, 2025December 16, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: Nintendo Has Decided That January 15th Is the Day We Finally Ascend to Our Highest Animal Crossing Selves…

Watch: EVANESCENCE Plays ‘Afterlife’ At 2025 GAME AWARDS—Apparently the Afterlife Is Full of Loot Boxes
Breaking, Games News, Music News

Watch: EVANESCENCE Plays ‘Afterlife’ At 2025 GAME AWARDS—Apparently the Afterlife Is Full of Loot Boxes

Chord F. DiscordDecember 12, 2025December 12, 2025

EVANESCENCE Just Stole the Show at the Game Awards, Because Apparently, Video Games Needed a Goth Makeover 🎮🖤 In a…

“Hold Onto Your Blocks: Minecraft’s New Barely-Controllable Pixel Beasts & MoJank’s Latest Recipe for Chaos!”
Breaking, Games News

“Hold Onto Your Blocks: Minecraft’s New Barely-Controllable Pixel Beasts & MoJank’s Latest Recipe for Chaos!”

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 11, 2025December 11, 2025

🐄 Hold onto your pickaxes, folks, because Minecraft just dropped its latest “content bomb”—Mounts of Mayhem™—and it’s precisely as chaotic…

Splinter Cell Reboot: Sam Fisher’s Back…Again (Hopefully Not Another Disappointment)
Breaking, Games News

Splinter Cell Reboot: Sam Fisher’s Back…Again (Hopefully Not Another Disappointment)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteDecember 2, 2025December 2, 2025

Breaking News: Ubisoft Hires Back Guy Who Already Left 🤡 To Direct Splinter Cell Remake! Is This Groundhog Day? In…

Ex-Fear Factory Drummer Thinks Dave Mustaine’s a Hater Because He Didn’t Fanboy Over His Megadeth Remix
Breaking, Music News

Ex-Fear Factory Drummer Thinks Dave Mustaine’s a Hater Because He Didn’t Fanboy Over His Megadeth Remix

Chord F. DiscordDecember 1, 2025December 1, 2025

In a recent tell-all with Story Mode, the legend himself, former FEAR FACTORY drum-banger Raymond Herrera (also known for composing…

Ripple Island: Kyle and Cal’s Culinary Catastrophe Now Plaguing Nintendo Switch 2 (allegedly) & Steam!
Breaking, Games News

Ripple Island: Kyle and Cal’s Culinary Catastrophe Now Plaguing Nintendo Switch 2 (allegedly) & Steam!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 27, 2025November 27, 2025

Alright gamers, listen up! 📢 SUNSOFT, bless their cotton socks, has unleashed Ripple Island: Kyle and Cal’s Restaurant upon the…

FX Dumps Another Bag of Cash on Ubisoft for a Far Cry TV Show Starring Some Dudes You’ve Heard Of
Breaking, Games News, Movie News

FX Dumps Another Bag of Cash on Ubisoft for a Far Cry TV Show Starring Some Dudes You’ve Heard Of

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 25, 2025November 25, 2025

OMG! FX is making a *Far Cry* TV show! 🤣 Prepare for cringey monologues and villains who think they’re deep…

Report: Xbox Might Make You Sell a Kidney Due to Recent RAM Shenanigans
Breaking, Games News

Report: Xbox Might Make You Sell a Kidney Due to Recent RAM Shenanigans

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 24, 2025November 24, 2025

Oh noes! 😭 Looks like Microsoft and Xbox dun goofed again! Reports are circulating faster than my uncle’s conspiracy theories…

Resident Evil: Requiem – Prepare to be Mildly Whemed, Says Totally Unbiased Producer
Breaking, Games News

Resident Evil: Requiem – Prepare to be Mildly Whemed, Says Totally Unbiased Producer

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 21, 2025November 21, 2025

OMG, Resident Evil: Requiem?! More like Resident Evil: Re-*sigh*-em. Capcom, you tease! We’re still scratching our heads about this game,…

Eclipse Glow Games Vomits New “Tides Of Annihilation” Trailer During Xbox Partner Preview (We’re So Sorry)
Breaking, Games News

Eclipse Glow Games Vomits New “Tides Of Annihilation” Trailer During Xbox Partner Preview (We’re So Sorry)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 21, 2025November 21, 2025

Alright gamers, buckle up because Eclipse Glow Games, in their infinite wisdom (or lack thereof), has dropped another trailer for…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 9 10 11 … 23 Next

Latest posts

  • Trump Org Accounts Closed Due To Totally Normal Banking Activity
  • Small Town’s Make-Out Point Purchased By Multinational Make-Out Conglomerate
  • WNBA Coaches Stumped As To What The ‘W’ Stands For
  • Tide yourself over with these shooters while Ready or Not 2 languishes
  • Cozy games conquer gaming with comforting escapism from monetized chaos

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.