Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Halloween

Because What The World Really Needed Was Another G.I. Joe Reboot
Breaking, Movie News

Because What The World Really Needed Was Another G.I. Joe Reboot

FinnJuly 16, 2026July 16, 2026

A new G.I. Joe movie is coming, because of course it is. The franchise that has been lurking in the…

Duran Duran back from dead again for London Halloween bash
Breaking, Live, Music News

Duran Duran back from dead again for London Halloween bash

Chord F. DiscordJuly 7, 2026July 7, 2026

Because the music world was just missing one thing – another Duran Duran tour – the iconic band has announced…

Behemoth is Taking a Whole Year Off to Recover from Nergal’s Ego Exhaustion
Breaking, Music News

Behemoth is Taking a Whole Year Off to Recover from Nergal’s Ego Exhaustion

Chord F. DiscordJune 26, 2026June 26, 2026

Breaking News: Behemoth Announces They’re Not Going to Tour as Much, and Honestly, Who Didn’t See This Coming? 🙄 In…

XBOX Games Showcase 2026: Castlevania: Belmont’s Curse Finally Arrives After Years of Delayed Expectations and Crushed Dreams October 15
Breaking, Games News

XBOX Games Showcase 2026: Castlevania: Belmont’s Curse Finally Arrives After Years of Delayed Expectations and Crushed Dreams October 15

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 8, 2026June 8, 2026

🎉👻 Konami has finally decided to stop milking the Metal Gear Solid series and has announced a new Castlevania game,…

Oh Joy Another Resident Evil Reboot Because the Last 12 Were Not Enough to Traumatize You for Life
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Joy Another Resident Evil Reboot Because the Last 12 Were Not Enough to Traumatize You for Life

FinnApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

Get ready for another epic failure in the Resident Evil movie franchise, because why not, right? 🙄 We’ve had like,…

MARILYN MANSON Throws 30th Birthday Party For ‘Antichrist Superstar’ With LA Shows Because Why Not?
Holy Shock Value, Batman! Marilyn Manson Is Coming to Haunt Your Halloween Like It's 1996 All Over Again!
Breaking, Music News

MARILYN MANSON Throws 30th Birthday Party For ‘Antichrist Superstar’ With LA Shows Because Why Not?

Chord F. DiscordMarch 28, 2026March 28, 2026

Attention, freaks, goths, and everyone who still thinks trench coats are a legitimate fashion choice: Marilyn Manson is staging his…

Scary Movie gets a poster — because even horror needs a marketing team to scream about it!
Scary Movie 6: The Final Chapter (Until the Next One)
Breaking, Movie News

Scary Movie gets a poster — because even horror needs a marketing team to scream about it!

FinnMarch 26, 2026March 26, 2026

Twenty-six years after surviving the most recognizable Halloween costume in cinematic history, the Core Four are back to prove that…

Jack Ryan’s Spinoff Film: Because One CIA Hero Wasn’t Enough, Here Comes ‘Ghost War’ to Steal the Spotlight
Breaking News: Jack Ryan’s Back, and This Time He’s Fighting Ghosts (No, Seriously)
Breaking, Movie News

Jack Ryan’s Spinoff Film: Because One CIA Hero Wasn’t Enough, Here Comes ‘Ghost War’ to Steal the Spotlight

FinnMarch 17, 2026March 17, 2026

Amazon has finally pulled the plug on its Jack Ryan TV series after four seasons of John Krasinski running around…

‘Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory’ Is a Secret Massacre Movie That Will Make You Question Your Childhood
Why Willy Wonka Is Secretly a Slasher Movie
Breaking, Movie News

‘Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory’ Is a Secret Massacre Movie That Will Make You Question Your Childhood

FinnMarch 12, 2026March 12, 2026

If I wanted to torture my brother when we were kids, I only needed to say two words: “Blueberry Girl.”…

Two G.I. Joe Movies in the Works: Because One Just Isn’t Confusing Enough
G.I. Joe: The Franchise That Refuses to Die, Kinda Like Cobra Commander After a Nuclear Apocalypse
Breaking, Movie News

Two G.I. Joe Movies in the Works: Because One Just Isn’t Confusing Enough

FinnFebruary 27, 2026February 27, 2026

G.I. Joe is back, baby! And by “back” we mean Paramount is once again attempting to turn a line of…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 2 3 4 … 10 Next

Latest posts

  • Trump Claims Iran Has Nuclear Drug Factories Because Why Not
  • Zach Bryan Rocks Free Palestine Shirt Onstage at Gillette Stadium
  • AOC and Bernie Sanders Intro The Strokes in New York City
  • AOC and Bernie Sanders Intro The Strokes at NYC Concert
  • Dave Grohl Joins AC/DC for Highway to Hell Performance

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.