Disturbed Finds 110,897 People Who Still Own CD Players on “The Sickness” Victory Lap
Alright, metalheads and casual listeners (we see you!), let’s talk about DISTURBED and their groundbreaking, earth-shattering, life-altering (yeah, right) “The…
Tag: hard rock
Sleep Token Accidentally Stumbles Onto Charts, Confuses Millions, Achieves “Success”
According to Billboard, SLEEP TOKEN’s fourth full-length studio effort, “Even In Arcadia”, has landed at position No. 1 on the…
Geriatric Rockers and Late Night Host Shill Out for Overpriced Coffee: A Tragedy in Four Lattes
LEGENDS OF CLASSIC ROCK, a supergroup so legendary it makes Spinal Tap look like a well-adjusted support group, graced the…
Scott Ian’s Jackson Guitar: Now in a Color That Might Actually Hide the Dents
Oh look, another guitar! 🙄 Apparently, Jackson, bless their corporate hearts, decided that what the world REALLY needed was ANOTHER…
Faster Pussycat Announces New Single ‘Motorbike,’ because apparently the 80s called and demanded their hairspray and questionable lyrics back 🙄 🏍️🎶
Oh. My. Gawd. 🙄 Faster Pussycat, those geriatric glam rockers who probably need walkers more than motorcycles, are releasing a…
Lemmy gets another statue in Stoke-On-Trent because one wasn’t nearly metal enough 🤘😂
Oh my gawd, you guize! 😱 They’re actually doing it! They’re building a monument to Lemmy in Stoke-on-Trent. Stoke-on-freaking-Trent! 🤣…
Klaus Meine says Scorpions are too busy napping to sting us with new tunes 😴🎸.
OMG! 😱 The Scorpions, those geriatric rock gods, are STILL alive and kicking…mostly! Klaus Meine, Rudolf Schenker, and Matthias Jabs…
Meow! 😹 Peter Criss, the catman who used to hit things in KISS, is rounding up a circus of ringers for his “hard rock” comeback, because why not? 🤷♂️
Hold onto your dentures, KISS Army, because the Catman is back…again! 🤣 Yes, Peter Criss, the legendary (or legendarily inconsistent,…
Sammy Hagar’s releasing a new song called “Encore, Thank You, Goodnight,” because apparently, he hasn’t said enough about Eddie Van Halen yet 🙄🎤🎸🔥.
🚨🚨🚨 RED ALERT! The Red Rocker, Sammy Hagar, is BACK…again! 🙄 This time, he’s gracing us with a new single,…
The Collection: Kirk Hammett: A Book Revealing All the Riffs Metallica’s Guitarist Stole Over 40 Years 😏
The music world is buzzing with anticipation! 🎸 Kirk Hammett, the legendary guitarist of Metallica, is set to release a…