Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Him

Noah Schnapp Accidentally Spills the Demogorgon Beans: ‘Stranger Things’ Season 5 Plot Twist Revealed (Oops!)
Breaking, Movie News

Noah Schnapp Accidentally Spills the Demogorgon Beans: ‘Stranger Things’ Season 5 Plot Twist Revealed (Oops!)

FinnNovember 18, 2025November 18, 2025

OMG!😱 Will Vecna, the dude who looks like Voldemort after a bad tanning session, get a REDEMPTION ARC in the…

Comey’s Indictment: Oops, Did We Mess Up Again
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Comey’s Indictment: Oops, Did We Mess Up Again

Big ElephantNovember 18, 2025November 18, 2025

Lock him up! Finally, some justice for the Deep State’s dirty deeds! This whole Russia hoax was a Comey special,…

Rev. Jesse Jackson Escapes ICU, Still Trapped in Hospital: A CNN Exclusive
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Rev. Jesse Jackson Escapes ICU, Still Trapped in Hospital: A CNN Exclusive

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Oh, bless his heart! Civil rights leader and professional race-baiter, Rev. Jesse Jackson, is still kicking! They say he’s “stable,”…

FEMA Chief Decides To Spend More Time With Family, Which Is Code For “Trump Was About To Fire Him”
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

FEMA Chief Decides To Spend More Time With Family, Which Is Code For “Trump Was About To Fire Him”

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Another Deep State Operative Bites the Dust! Richardson, the now-former head of FEMA, is out! Sources say this lib couldn’t…

Pilot Gets Grounded: The Ultimate “How Not to Fly” Guide
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Pilot Gets Grounded: The Ultimate “How Not to Fly” Guide

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Another day, another win for the woke mob! This time, a pilot hopped up on psychedelic mushrooms tried to shut…

‘Moana’ Remake Teaser: Because the Original Wasn’t Good Enough, Apparently
Breaking, Movie News

‘Moana’ Remake Teaser: Because the Original Wasn’t Good Enough, Apparently

FinnNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

OMG! 🙄 Can you believe it’s only been, like, NINE years since Moana brainwashed our kids? 🤯 Apparently, that’s enough…

RUNNING WILD to FINALLY Release New Album in Summer 2026 (If They Remember To)
Breaking, Music News

RUNNING WILD to FINALLY Release New Album in Summer 2026 (If They Remember To)

Chord F. DiscordNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Ahoy, mateys! Prepare yourselves for another legendary saga! 🤣 The geriatric pirates of RUNNING WILD are STILL allegedly working on…

Paul Stanley Threatens World with ‘Probable’ New KISS Music: ‘I’ve Been Writing’
Breaking, Music News

Paul Stanley Threatens World with ‘Probable’ New KISS Music: ‘I’ve Been Writing’

Chord F. DiscordNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

On November 16th, the geriatric quartet known as KISS 👴👵— Paul Stanley (aka the Starchild who should really embrace his…

State Dept to brand Venezuelan Cartel as certified super-villains, because why not
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

State Dept to brand Venezuelan Cartel as certified super-villains, because why not

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Another day, another victory for President Trump in the ongoing battle against globalist scum and their drug-peddling pals! Secretary of…

Breaking: Reverend Jesse Jackson Plugged into Wall Socket, Family Claims He’s “Charging”
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Breaking: Reverend Jesse Jackson Plugged into Wall Socket, Family Claims He’s “Charging”

Big ElephantNovember 16, 2025November 16, 2025

Looks like the race-baiting Reverend Jesse Jackson is finally facing the music! They say he’s on life support, probably because…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 137 138 139 … 161 Next

Latest posts

  • Trump Drops Bombshell Evidence Biden Actively Campaigned Against Him
  • Raconteurs Unveil Broken Boy Soldiers 20th Anniversary Vault Package
  • Democrats Use Epstein Victim’s Family in Slick New Ad Campaign
  • Doechii, Phoebe Bridgers, Fontaines D.C. Top Primavera Sound Anniversary Bill
  • Biden and Trump Unite For World Peace Apparently

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.