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Canoeist David Hearn Denies Messing Up Pool Again
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Canoeist David Hearn Denies Messing Up Pool Again

Big ElephantJuly 9, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Former Olympic canoeist David Hearn pleaded not guilty in Washington, DC,…

NYC High-Rise Still Standing Barely
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

NYC High-Rise Still Standing Barely

Big ElephantJuly 9, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest chaos in Midtown Manhattan, where a high-rise building’s structural columns buckled,…

Taxpayers’ Favorite Reflecting Pool Gets Another Free Renovation
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Taxpayers’ Favorite Reflecting Pool Gets Another Free Renovation

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest shenanigans at the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool, where three more…

Graham Platner quits Senate bid clearing path for Democrats
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Graham Platner quits Senate bid clearing path for Democrats

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest drama in the Maine Senate race, and folks, it’s a doozy.…

Because We Needed Another Dune Movie To Complete Our Souls
Breaking, Movie News

Because We Needed Another Dune Movie To Complete Our Souls

FinnJuly 8, 2026July 8, 2026

It’s a miracle that will be etched in the annals of Hollywood history: Denis Villeneuve has managed to complete not…

Platner’s Campaign Quietly Folding Like a Cheap Lawn Chair
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Platner’s Campaign Quietly Folding Like a Cheap Lawn Chair

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and trying to wrap my head around this one. Graham Platner, the Senate candidate from…

Asia: Where Americans Go To Remember Vegetables Exist
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Asia: Where Americans Go To Remember Vegetables Exist

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A young artist and designer from Atlanta, Isaias, traveled all the…

Trump Still Obsessed With Communism Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Still Obsessed With Communism Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 8, 2026

So, I was reading this article on CNN, sipping my coffee, and I just about spit it out when I…

El-Sayed and Stevens get feisty over AIPAC in Michigan Senate debate
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

El-Sayed and Stevens get feisty over AIPAC in Michigan Senate debate

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Michigan Senate Democratic debate between Rep. Haley Stevens and Abdul…

Graham Platner’s Ex Details Alleged Abuse He Totally Didn’t Do Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Graham Platner’s Ex Details Alleged Abuse He Totally Didn’t Do Apparently

Big ElephantJuly 7, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about this Maine Senate candidate, Graham Platner, and I just can’t help but…

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Latest posts

  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS Donald J Trump vows to beautify Washington DC with no crime
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social on July 10 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald Trump endorses Jay Feely for Arizona congressional seat
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Trump endorses Mark Lamb for Arizona’s 5th Congressional District
  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS: Congressman Abe Hamadeh gets total endorsement for re-election

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Finn December 31, 2025
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