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JOHN 5 Is ‘Super Excited’ About Setlist For MÖTLEY CRÜE’s Summer 2026 Tour Because Finally He Can Play That One Song He Practiced for 8 Hours
Breaking, Music News

JOHN 5 Is ‘Super Excited’ About Setlist For MÖTLEY CRÜE’s Summer 2026 Tour Because Finally He Can Play That One Song He Practiced for 8 Hours

Chord F. DiscordMarch 2, 2026March 2, 2026

Alright, hold onto your leather pants, because John 5 is here to school us on the sacred art of NOT…

HBO Max and Paramount+ to Merge: Now You Can Watch ‘Game of Thrones’ and ‘SpongeBob’ in One Sitting
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

HBO Max and Paramount+ to Merge: Now You Can Watch ‘Game of Thrones’ and ‘SpongeBob’ in One Sitting

Big ElephantMarch 2, 2026March 2, 2026

Deep State Media Merger Exposed: HBO Max and Paramount+ Combine to Create Liberal Propaganda Super Streamer In yet another brazen…

BREAKING: 59% of Americans Say “Nope” to Iran Strikes, Majority Predicts Endless War — Because Why Stop at One?
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

BREAKING: 59% of Americans Say “Nope” to Iran Strikes, Majority Predicts Endless War — Because Why Stop at One?

Big ElephantMarch 2, 2026March 2, 2026

Well, well, well, looks like the fake news media is once again pushing their anti-Trump propaganda! Can you believe this…

This Solar Panel Blooms Every Morning, Because Even the Sun Needs a Little Help Waking Up!
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

This Solar Panel Blooms Every Morning, Because Even the Sun Needs a Little Help Waking Up!

Big ElephantMarch 2, 2026March 2, 2026

Leftist Loonies Push “Smartflower” Solar Panels as Next Step in Globalist Green Agenda Liberals are at it again, folks! This…

Events

ST. PRACTICE BAR CRAWL 2026: PREPARE FOR A LIT LENTEN LIVER-PUNCHING ODYSSEY!

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 2, 2026

ST. PRACTICE BAR CRAWL 2026 – Royal Oak Saturday, March 7th, 2026 | 2 – 7 PM Downtown Royal Oak…

Events

“OMG YALL READY FOR SOME TOTALLY RADICAL FANTASY FRIDAYS?! 🧙‍♂️✨”

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 2, 2026

#1 FRIDAY NIGHT IN ATLANTA OMG, it’s #1 FRIDAY NIGHT IN ATLANTA, y’all! 🎉 Prepare for the most epic, life-changing…

Events

FRIDAY FANTASIES: WHERE DREAMS AND DELUSIONS COLLIDE!

Chuck B. BallsyMarch 2, 2026

#1 FRIDAY NIGHT IN ATLANTA Join us every week at FANTASY FRIDAYS for an unforgettable night of music, dancing, and…

In A Violent Nature 2 Unleashes Its Teaser Trailer, Because One Bloodbath Just Wasn’t Enough
Breaking, Movie News

In A Violent Nature 2 Unleashes Its Teaser Trailer, Because One Bloodbath Just Wasn’t Enough

FinnMarch 1, 2026March 1, 2026

In A Violent Nature — because apparently we needed more movies where the killer is the protagonist and not, you…

Star City – Check Out This Hilariously Ambitious Russian Space Soap Opera That’s Definitely Not a For All Mankind Knockoff
Breaking News: Apple TV's "Star City" Promises to Make Soviets Cool Again
Breaking, Movie News

Star City – Check Out This Hilariously Ambitious Russian Space Soap Opera That’s Definitely Not a For All Mankind Knockoff

FinnMarch 1, 2026March 1, 2026

Well, well, well, look who decided to dust off the old Soviet propaganda machine and give it a shiny Apple…

Headbanging Their Way to Eurovision Glory: LAVINA Rocks Serbia’s Spot in 2026 Eurotrash Extravaganza
Breaking, Music News

Headbanging Their Way to Eurovision Glory: LAVINA Rocks Serbia’s Spot in 2026 Eurotrash Extravaganza

Chord F. DiscordMarch 1, 2026March 1, 2026

Oh look, another “modern” metal band from the Balkans, because apparently Europe hasn’t had enough of those. But hey, at…

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Latest posts

  • Super Official Totally Not Made Up Book About SLIPKNOT That They Definitely Didnt Try To Stop From Being Written All About Their Rise To Fame And The Chaos
  • Ninja Theory Finally Admits They Got Bored And Stopped Working On Project Mara Because Let’s Be Real It Was Never Going To Be As Cool As DmC Anyway
  • L.A. Vote Update: Spencer Pratt Now At Negative One Billion Votes
  • SEGA Finally Decides to Explain What the Heck Theyre Doing with GenAI in Crazy Taxi: World Tour Because Apparently Nobody Had a Clue
  • Snooze fest: Crazy Horse kin hid from America’s greatness obviously

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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