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Feds Spying on Minnesota Progressives Because Who Needs Privacy Anyway
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Feds Spying on Minnesota Progressives Because Who Needs Privacy Anyway

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Federal agents launched a sweeping undercover surveillance operation targeting progressive organizations,…

Trump Gives Corporations License To Hack Around
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Gives Corporations License To Hack Around

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Trump administration is now enlisting private companies to conduct cyberattacks…

Selena Gomez’s Mental Health Startup Apparently Needs Therapy Itself
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Selena Gomez’s Mental Health Startup Apparently Needs Therapy Itself

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Selena Gomez’s mental health startup, Wondermind, and I have to say, it’s a…

Nick Holmes Still Clinging To Gothic Metal Label Because It Sounds Cooler Than Middle Aged Man Playing Music
Breaking, Music News

Nick Holmes Still Clinging To Gothic Metal Label Because It Sounds Cooler Than Middle Aged Man Playing Music

Chord F. DiscordAugust 14, 2026August 14, 2026

Oh no, the pioneers of gothic metal are still alive and kicking, and I’m not sure if I should be…

Europe’s Economy Gets Double Whammy of Weather and War
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Europe’s Economy Gets Double Whammy of Weather and War

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Europe is having a rough summer, and I’m not just talking…

Nolan Wells’ death sparks delightful conspiracy theories and threats apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Nolan Wells’ death sparks delightful conspiracy theories and threats apparently

Big ElephantAugust 14, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading this story about a group of friends who went to Horn Island in Mississippi…

Fake Electors Totally Not Guilty Of Faking Election Stuff Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Fake Electors Totally Not Guilty Of Faking Election Stuff Apparently

Big ElephantAugust 13, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A judge in Nevada just dismissed the case against six Republicans…

Lindsay Clancy’s Cellphone Reveals Steep Descent into Chaos Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Lindsay Clancy’s Cellphone Reveals Steep Descent into Chaos Apparently

Big ElephantAugust 13, 2026

I’m sitting here with my coffee, reading about the Lindsay Clancy trial, and I have to say, it’s a real…

Biden Team Desperately Seeks Less Awkward Press Secretary
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Biden Team Desperately Seeks Less Awkward Press Secretary

Big ElephantAugust 13, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. It seems like Washington is abuzz with the latest game of…

Feds Suddenly Forget How Guns Work Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Feds Suddenly Forget How Guns Work Apparently

Big ElephantAugust 13, 2026

Well, folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one – it seems like the Justice Department has decided not…

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