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Tag: Lists

The Best New TV Shows on Streaming This Weekend (That Will Probably Suck But Here We Are)
Breaking, Movie News

The Best New TV Shows on Streaming This Weekend (That Will Probably Suck But Here We Are)

FinnJanuary 12, 2026January 12, 2026

🚨 BREAKING: Your Couch Just Got a Promotion! 🍿 New Shows Are Here to Haunt Your Binge-Watching Soul (and Your…

5 Sequels That Completely Abandoned the Original Film’s Genre Like a Coward
Breaking, Movie News

5 Sequels That Completely Abandoned the Original Film’s Genre Like a Coward

FinnJanuary 7, 2026January 7, 2026

🚨 BREAKING: Hollywood Discovers Sequels Are Basically Just the Same Movie, But With More Explosions (And Less Logic) 🚨 Ah,…

10 Remakes That Completely Butchered the Original in the Funniest Genres Possible
Breaking, Movie News

10 Remakes That Completely Butchered the Original in the Funniest Genres Possible

FinnJanuary 4, 2026January 4, 2026

🚨BREAKING: Hollywood Discovers That Copying Movies Is Cheaper Than Therapy, Proceeds to Ruin Everything We Loved 🚨 In a stunning…

NECROBUTCHER Hopes MAYHEM Survives Another Two Decades of Corpse Paint and Chaos
Breaking, Music News

NECROBUTCHER Hopes MAYHEM Survives Another Two Decades of Corpse Paint and Chaos

Chord F. DiscordDecember 29, 2025December 29, 2025

🎵 When Black Metal Meets Retirement Plans: MAYHEM’s Quest to Outlive Their Fans (and Possibly Themselves) 🧓‍♂️⚰️ In a shocking…

The 15 Movies Hollywood Thinks Will Distract You From the Impending Apocalypse
Breaking, Movie News

The 15 Movies Hollywood Thinks Will Distract You From the Impending Apocalypse

FinnDecember 29, 2025December 29, 2025

2026: The Year Hollywood Decided to Throw a $2 Billion Birthday Party for Itself (And Accidentally Invited Us) Ah yes,…

The Most Expensive Disasters of 2025
Breaking, Movie News

The Most Expensive Disasters of 2025

FinnDecember 29, 2025December 29, 2025

2025 was a cinematic dumpster fire wrapped in a CGI explosion and served with a side of “but the algorithm…

Rep. Madeleine Dean on DOJ’s 1 Million New Epstein Docs: ‘You Don’t Know What You’re Missing Till You Try to Hide Them’
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Rep. Madeleine Dean on DOJ’s 1 Million New Epstein Docs: ‘You Don’t Know What You’re Missing Till You Try to Hide Them’

Big ElephantDecember 26, 2025December 26, 2025

Justice Department Finds Over 1 Million New Epstein Documents—Because Apparently They Just Started Looking in the Break Room In a…

The 10 Most Underrated Movies of 2025 (Because Apparently No One Has Taste)
Breaking, Movie News

The 10 Most Underrated Movies of 2025 (Because Apparently No One Has Taste)

FinnDecember 18, 2025December 18, 2025

Based on the complete and utter financial train wreck that was this year’s box office, there are only two possible…

Courts Tell Trump-Backed Snoops to Try Again, Maybe With a Cookie Recipe
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Courts Tell Trump-Backed Snoops to Try Again, Maybe With a Cookie Recipe

Big ElephantDecember 18, 2025December 18, 2025

Trump’s FOIA Fishing Expedition Flops: Judge Slams Door on America First Legal’s Judicial Stalker Scheme In a stunning twist that…

Why 2026 Could Be the Year of Anti-AI Marketing (Because Robots Stole Our Jokes)
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Why 2026 Could Be the Year of Anti-AI Marketing (Because Robots Stole Our Jokes)

Big ElephantDecember 16, 2025December 16, 2025

The AI Slopocalypse: How the Liberal Elite’s Obsession with Artificial Intelligence Has Infested Everything Good in America Well, would you…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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