Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: metal

FEAR FACTORY Finally Replaces Dino With Some Guy Named Milo
Breaking, Music News

FEAR FACTORY Finally Replaces Dino With Some Guy Named Milo

Chord F. DiscordJuly 16, 2026July 16, 2026

Breaking News: FEAR FACTORY Announces New Album and Tour, Because You Clearly Didn’t Have Enough of Their Soul-Crushing Riffs in…

GHOST makes movie about themselves because humility is overrated
Breaking, Music News

GHOST makes movie about themselves because humility is overrated

Chord F. DiscordJuly 16, 2026July 16, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some more GHOST?! 🤯 Because, apparently, millions of you demanded it… again. The…

DUEL in Charlotte, NC(07/15/2026)
Videos

DUEL in Charlotte, NC(07/15/2026)

Chuck B. BallsyJuly 16, 2026

Psychedelic Doom/Stoner Metal/Rock from Austin, Texas Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan…

Cosmic Reaper in Charlotte, NC(07/15/2026)
Videos

Cosmic Reaper in Charlotte, NC(07/15/2026)

Chuck B. BallsyJuly 16, 2026

Doom/Sludge from Charlotte, NC Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,”…

Bongfoot in Charlotte, NC(07/15/2026)
Videos

Bongfoot in Charlotte, NC(07/15/2026)

Chuck B. BallsyJuly 16, 2026

"Appalachian Thrash" from Raleigh/Boone, NC Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…

The Fastest Way to End a Metal Argument 🤘 ⭐
Videos

The Fastest Way to End a Metal Argument 🤘 ⭐

Chuck B. BallsyJuly 15, 2026

Some debates aren't worth having. 🤘 Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan…

Slipknot hires producer Matt Wallace because 50 arrangements clearly isnt enough chaos
Breaking, Music News

Slipknot hires producer Matt Wallace because 50 arrangements clearly isnt enough chaos

Chord F. DiscordJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some exciting news? 🤯 SLIPKNOT is working on new music, and I can…

Anthrax teams up with Z2 because you clearly didnt have enough anthrax in your life
Breaking, Music News

Anthrax teams up with Z2 because you clearly didnt have enough anthrax in your life

Chord F. DiscordJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic news? 🤯 I just found out that thrash metal legends ANTHRAX…

Death Angel to somehow still exist in 2026 and tour Europe because you clearly needed this
Breaking, Music News

Death Angel to somehow still exist in 2026 and tour Europe because you clearly needed this

Chord F. DiscordJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

Oh great, because what the world really needed was another tour announcement from a band that’s been around longer than…

Jason Newsted gets throat cancer because your nu-metal screams werent loud enough
Breaking, Music News

Jason Newsted gets throat cancer because your nu-metal screams werent loud enough

Chord F. DiscordJuly 15, 2026July 15, 2026

Jason Newsted, the former Metallica bassist, has announced that he’s hitting the road with his band, The Chophouse Band, and…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 20 21 22 … 174 Next

Latest posts

  • Rob Zombie in Charlotte, NC (08/24/2026)11:36 PM
  • The Hu in Charlotte, NC (08/24/2026)
  • Marilyn Manson in Charlotte, NC (08/24/2026)
  • Rob Zombie in Charlotte, NC (08/24/2026)
  • Air Force Officer Charged For Daring To Criticize Dear Leader

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.